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Zero Jokes

What do short people call something that's too high up?

Absolute zero, because it's impossible to reach

Love

Love

What did a binary number say to another?

I'm the one, you zero!

What did the zero say to the eight?

Nice belt.

How many programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Zero.

What's it like being frozen to absolute zero?

It's 0K.

When did 888 equal zero????

When Eight ate eight

What do Zero and Nil have in common?

Absolutely nothing

How much Squidwards does it take to fix a lightbulb?

Zero, because none of them knows how to

What is zero in Roman numerals?

Nothing

What do a zero-legged spider and a one-legged bear have in common?

They both have at least zero legs.

How many redditors does it take to screw in a new lightbulb?

Zero. Somebody already did it.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

How do you feel if subjected to temperatures of absolute zero?

0K

What does Mexican binary code consist of?

Zeros and Juans.

What's your favorite joke appropriate for a 6-8 year old?

I am a ski instructor and I've recently been teaching these two boys who are 6 and 8 year old brothers. I realized today that I know zero jokes appropriate enough or funny to this demographic. I feel like they think I am super boring. Give me some help to make the chairlift more exciting!!

What does the zero say to the eight?

I like your belt. Ok, ok. I know it's elementary, but I still love it.

What was the score of the lobster soccer game?

Zero to zero. Lobsters can't kick soccer balls.

How do you know you're golfing with a politician?

When they get a hole-in-one they write down *zero* on the scorecard.

What'd the scientist say to the man who was frozen to absolute zero?

Are you 0K

How many zeroes does your salary have?

He responds "One" "In which currency " "Any :("

How many mathematicians does it take to screw in zero lightbulbs?

Indeterminate

What did the number zero say to the number eight?

Nice belt.

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Everyday Deserves a Joke

What do you call a couple of ones and zeros orbiting around each other?

Binary stars.

How do I find answers using Google.com?

On Yahoo Answers. Stand by while the internet divides itself by zero.

How many zeros in one million?

Six" "Ok, thanks" *writes milli000000n*

Why do athletes prefer nuns to time their laps?

Because when a nun times anything it's zero. (0*n=0)

What did the number zero say to the number 8?

I like your belt

How are you doing in arithmetic?

I've learned to add up the zeros but the numbers are still giving me trouble.

Why does everyone find the absolute value of zero so funny?

L0l

How many scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Significantly more than zero, *p* < .001.

How many people at a Music Festival does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Zero, its already lit

What's an acceptable absolute zero?

0K.

We've Got This Love Thing Down

We've Got This Love Thing Down

Why can a number divided by zero never be found in the dictionary?

Because it's undefined.

What's the similarity between your zero-exercise lifestyle and a professional weight-lifter competing in the Olympics?

They both involve muscles and they both result in a-trophy.

What do you call a scale that always resets itself to zero?

Tareable

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Somebody Jokes More Somebody Jokes

Why can you always trust Frankenstein's monster?

He's got somebody else's back, he could probably handle yours.

Whats the last letter in the alphabet?

Somebody help plz I need help on kindergarten project

Ebt Jokes More Ebt Jokes

How many Android users does it take to buy an iPhone?

Zero. Apple doesn't accept EBT.

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

Why did the golfer need to buy a new pair of socks?

Because he got a hole in one!

How does Moses get his coffee?

He buys it from Starbucks...

888 Jokes More 888 Jokes

When did 888 equal zero????

When Eight ate eight

What a Chinese Restaurant Owner's Preferred License Plate?

888 MSG

Squidward Jokes More Squidward Jokes

What do you call Squidward when he gives DNA results for a living?

You call 'im Maury.

How much Squidwards does it take to fix a lightbulb?

Zero, because none of them knows how to

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

How long have you felt like this?

Ever since I was a puppy!

How did the midget feel after sleeping all night in a coffin?

A little stiff.

Apple Jokes More Apple Jokes

What kind of phone does The Flash use?

Not an iPhone because Apple doesn't support flash

What do Apple and Blackberry have in common?

Neither one has Jobs.

Subject Jokes More Subject Jokes

What subject did the Warlock major in at University?

Fel-osophy

Why did the researchers stopped their research on embryos?

Because the subject is still to immature.