Israeli Jokes

How does Moses make his tea?

Hebrews it. I'm serious! That Israeli how he does it!

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What do you call the Israeli PM when he switches search engines?

Benjamin Netangoogle

How do Israeli skiiers greet each other?

Shlalom! (Oy, that's terrible.)

What did the Germans name the Israeli Submarine?

Das Jude

What did the Israeli Prime Minister who can't say the word "and" say about candy that caused such a hubbub?

Mike Ike's are my least favorite.

What's an Israeli ghetto called?

Palestine.

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Cause Jokes More Cause Jokes

Why do girls like nice guys?

Cause nice guys always finish last.

Why does flint never get any likes on their Instagram pictures?

Cause they don't use a filter.

Israelite Jokes More Israelite Jokes

What type of lights were on Noah's Ark?

You'd think it would be floodlights, but in reality it was the Israelites!

What did the Israelite say to the American when offering him a drink?

Here, try this, Israeli refreshing!

Replay Jokes More Replay Jokes

How did the drunk Irish man lose 30$?

He bet 10$ on the soccer game and 20$ on the replay.

Moses Jokes More Moses Jokes

How does Moses make his tea?

Hebrews it. I'm serious! That Israeli how he does it!

Why did Moses wander in the desert for 40 years?

Even then men wouldn't ask for directions!

Offer Jokes More Offer Jokes

Why did the Pokemon Company offer me a role in their upcoming TV Series?

So they could Starmie.

Why should you work for a vegetable factory?

Because they offer a good celery.

Word Jokes More Word Jokes

Which word is the longest in the English language?

Smiles - because there is a mile between the first and last letters

How many syllables does the word "Gloria" have?

CATHOLICS: 18

Tea Jokes More Tea Jokes

Why can't the Maple Leafs have any tea?

Because Boston has all the cups!

Why do hipsters burn their lips when they drink tea?

Because they drink it before it's cool.

Candy Jokes More Candy Jokes

Whats your favorite pickup line?

Mine is: I'll give you candy if you get in the van

What did the candy say as they saw a group of intimidating crackers approach?

Cheez It!