Jfk Jokes

Why JFK doesn't wear hats?

It is an airport.

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Why didn't JFK ever like vodka?

Because he couldn't handle a few shots

What did Marily Monroe and Lee Harvey Oswald have in common?

They both banged JFK

What did JFK say about his multiple affairs?

I did them not because they were easy, but because I was hard.

What do you get when you order a JFK?

An americano with an extra shot

Why couldn't JFK be a boxer?

He couldn't take shots to the head.

What was the last thing that went through JFK's head?

A bullet.

What did JFK say before going to visit Marilyn Monroe?

I choose to go to Marilyn's hotel room this night and do the naughty things, not because she is easy, but because I am hard.

How do we know JFK was a fan of PDA?

He was all over his wife at the parade

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Boxer Jokes More Boxer Jokes

What is not allowed in the ring, but boxers do every night?

Hit the sack.

What do you get if you cross a Boxer and a Pug?

A pugilist!

Fan Jokes More Fan Jokes

Why was it so hot in the stadium after the game?

Because all the fans left

Why did the kid steal the fan?

He wanted to be cool.

Marilyn Monroe Jokes More Marilyn Monroe Jokes

What did JFK say before going to visit Marilyn Monroe?

I choose to go to Marilyn's hotel room this night and do the naughty things, not because she is easy, but because I am hard.

What would Marilyn Monroe be doing if she were alive today?

Clawing at the inside of her coffin.

Bullet Jokes More Bullet Jokes

Why do police in the US carry a tazer and pepper spray?

In case they run out of bullets.

What will it take to reunite Nirvana?

Two more bullets.

Miss Jokes More Miss Jokes

What do you call an octopus that's missing one tentacle?

Octopus Prime.

What do you call a terrorist who's missing an eye?

Him: I give up Me: A terrorst

Airport Jokes More Airport Jokes

What do you call a government official that can't leave an airport because of a blizzard?

Edward Snowed In

How does a german get to the airport?

He heils a taxi!

Visit Jokes More Visit Jokes

Who's winning Went to visit my Granddad. He was watching a basketball game. "What's the score Gramps?

92 to 86." "Who's winning " I asked. "92"

Where do black people stay when they visit Alaska?

A nigloo

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Why do kids with down syndrome wear shorts?

Because they have bad genes.

Why don't catholics wear condoms?

Because little boys can't get pregnant.