How many alcoholics does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb, and one to drink until the room starts spinning.

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Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

What do sick composers drink?

Tchai Tea

Where does a cow stop to drink?

The milky way!

Start Jokes More Start Jokes

What do you call a computer that says hello to you when you start it up?

A Dell.

What word starts with F and ends with UCK?

Firetruck

Bulb Jokes More Bulb Jokes

How many talking heads does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb, and another to spin the story until the bulb fits.

How many Irish folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb and one to sing about how grand the old bulb was.

Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

What do you call a wizard holding a teacup?

A saucer-er!

What do you do when you want to hold a bunny?

You grabbit.

Spin Jokes More Spin Jokes

What did the tornado say to the car?

('You wanna go for a spin ')

What do you call it when you spin a candy cane?

A tournament

Change Jokes More Change Jokes

How many PETA memebers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. PETA can't change anything.

How many senior medical consultants does it take to change a lightbulb?

Just one. He holds up the bulb and waits for the world to revolve around him.

Light Bulb Jokes More Light Bulb Jokes

How many indie bands does it take to change a light bulb?

Eh, it's some number you've probably never heard of.

How many Anime characters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only 1, but it takes them 15 episodes to do it.

Room Jokes More Room Jokes

How much room is needed for fungi to grow?

As mushroom as possible

What do Michael Jackson and Santa Claus have in common?

They both leave little boys rooms with empty sacks.

Alcoholic Jokes More Alcoholic Jokes

What do an alcoholic and a necrophile have in common?

They both like to crack open a cold one.

What does an alcoholic do when he is out of beer?

Wine