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What did the English teacher write when she needed to borrow money?

An AE I.O.U. P.S. Im proud of this one

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Need Jokes More Need Jokes

What are your intentions with our daughter?

Uh I need someone to sing the girl parts of Grease songs with me

What does a gun, a fire extinguisher, and a condom have in common?

Its better to have it and not need it, then to need it and not have it

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

Why did the farmer feed money to his cow?

He wanted rich milk!

Why was the fruit farmer losing money?

He couldn't grow a pear

M Jokes More M Jokes

What did the stork say to the couple?

Sorry mates Im out of babes (its a linguistic joke)

Why is the new Zork game rated M for mature?

I guess it's too grue-some.

English Jokes More English Jokes

What did the verb say when the words have, has, and had were removed from the English language?

"Nobody's perfect!"

What does a cab driver have in common with a pool cue ball?

The harder you hit them, the more English you get out.

Write Jokes More Write Jokes

How do you spell ichael?

The teacher was rather bewildered. "Don't you mean Michael " she asked. "No ma'am. I've written the 'M' already."

What do you say when Al Gore writes computer code?

He's writing an Algorithm!

P.S. Jokes More P.S. Jokes

What did the English teacher write when she needed to borrow money?

An AE I.O.U. P.S. Im proud of this one

What do you call cute seeds?

Awwwwwwwwwwwwmonds P.S. it's my birthday please love me

English Teacher Jokes More English Teacher Jokes

Why did the English teacher hire a midget geography nut as his lawyer?

He wanted someone who understood and case.

What do you call an English teacher who used to have anxiety?

Past tense.

Borrow Jokes More Borrow Jokes

What did Larry McMurtry say when his neighbor asked to borrow a bar of soap?

He said "Sure! I could loan some Dove".

Why is someone who borrows money but does not pay it all back like a football player?

Because sometimes he gives you a quarter back and sometimes a half back.