English Teacher Jokes

What did the English teacher write when she needed to borrow money?

An AE I.O.U. P.S. Im proud of this one

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What do you call an English teacher who used to have anxiety?

Past tense.

Why did the English teacher hire a midget geography nut as his lawyer?

He wanted someone who understood and case.

Where did the English teacher and the student fight?

In the MLA boxing ring

Who, what, when, where and why?

English teachers and Alzheimer's patients

How is a judge like an English teacher?

They both hand out long sentences.

When is an English teacher like a judge?

When she hands out long sentences.

Why don't English teachers like parole?

They prefer complete sentences.

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Need Jokes More Need Jokes

Why did the golfer need to buy a new pair of socks?

Because he got a hole in one!

What is your best lawyer joke?

I need some new material for the court house.

Alzheimer Patient Jokes More Alzheimer Patient Jokes

How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb?

To get to the other side!

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb?

To get to the other side.

English Jokes More English Jokes

Why do they call a horse a horse?

Because they speak English.

What's an English geologist's favourite fruit?

A pomegranate.

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

What is a small loan of money?

A small loan of a million dollars

What did the English teacher write when she needed to borrow money?

An AE I.O.U. P.S. Im proud of this one

Understand Jokes More Understand Jokes

What thoughts do Blondes have after reading these jokes?

None as usual... and they most likely didn't understand them either.

What sound do dogs make?

3-year-old: Woof woof. Me: Horses 3: Neigh. Me: Pigs 3: Sizzle sizzle. Somebody understands bacon.

Long Sentence Jokes More Long Sentence Jokes

What's the worlds longest sentence?

I do.

How is a judge like an English teacher?

They both hand out long sentences.

Toe Jokes More Toe Jokes

Why do ballerinas stand on their toes?

Can't they just get taller women

Why did the blonde write "TGIF" on her shoes?

A. To remind her that "toes go in first."

Write Jokes More Write Jokes

How many biologists does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it and three to write the environmental-impact statement.

Who wrote it?

Major Bumsore