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What does a fire, flood, earthquake, tornado, hurricane, and a wife have in common?

Sooner or later, one of them is probably going to get your house.

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What's the definition of a Polygamist?

Pupil: A parrot with more than one wife!

How the fight started Wife: Going for a walk, do you want anything?

Me: How about a newspaper. Wife: OK, which one Me: Today's.

House Jokes More House Jokes

How does a Mexican build a house?

Juan nail at a time.

Why are the corners the warmest part of every house?

Because they're 90 degrees!

Fire Jokes More Fire Jokes

What do you call an alpacca that screams when it sees fire?

A smoke aLaama.

How do you advertise a French rifle?

Never fired, dropped once.

Tornado Jokes More Tornado Jokes

What do you call a tornado holding a spork?

The Mersenne Twister.

What does a tornado and a woman have in common?

It starts with a little blowing but at the end your house is gone

Hurricane Jokes More Hurricane Jokes

What do a hurricane a tornado a fire and a divorce have in common?

They are four ways you can lose your house!

How do hurricanes see?

With one eye

Earthquake Jokes More Earthquake Jokes

Whose fault is it that California always has earthquakes?

San Andreas fault.

What did San Andreas said to the Earthquake?

This is all your fault!

Flood Jokes More Flood Jokes

Why are Dutch people so tall?

The short ones drowned in the floods

Why did the Irish Football manager flood the pitch?

So he could bring his 'sub' on