Earthquake Jokes

What do you call a cow during an earthquake?

A milkshake

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What do you call an earthquake in NYC?

Harlem Shake.

What did the Mexican gang member say when two large houses fell on him during an earthquake?

Get off me, homes.

What did San Andreas said to the Earthquake?

This is all your fault!

What's the difference between Michael j. Fox and an earthquake?

Earthquakes stop shaking

What did one tectonic plate say to the other after the earthquake?

That was your fault!!!

What causes German Earthquakes?

Teutonic Plates.

What does one tectonics plate say to another after an earthquake?

It's not your fault.

Whose fault is it that California always has earthquakes?

San Andreas fault.

What did one earthquake say to the other?

I don't know what you're blaming me for, it's your fault!

What was James Bond after he slept through an earthquake?

Shaken, not stirred.

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What did the ground say to the earthquake?

It's your fault!

What did the Earth say to the Earthquake?

Sorry...that was my fault.

What did one mountain say to the other mountain after an earthquake?

It's not my fault.

What did one earthquake say to the other earthquake?

I've been really stressed out lately, I know it's not your fault, but please stop cracking jokes about me

What does a fire, flood, earthquake, tornado, hurricane, and a wife have in common?

Sooner or later, one of them is probably going to get your house.

Why did the seismologist not have to pay for the damage caused by the earthquake?

It wasn't his fault.

Where is the safest place to be during an earthquake?

A hot air balloon #JonsSafetyTips #Safety #safetyTip #EarthquakeSafetyFacts

What do you call a cow in an earthquake?

A milkshake What do you call a cow with no legs ground beef What do you call a cow with 3 legs lean beef

What did the earthquake say to all of its victims?

Oh, sorry...my fault.

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Shots.

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Congee-gal visit

Who plays those kind of jokes anymore?

You're scaring my wife. She's only 12, jeez.

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How do you make a strawberry shake?

You put it in a freezer!

What lies on the bottom of the sea and shakes?

A nervous wreck! I first heard this at xmas 1952 (64 years ago) and it still makes me smile.

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Where do shapes go to pay for their crimes?

A prism.

What does a walrus and Tupperware have in common?

They both like a tight seal *What looks like a lemon and shaped like a rock?.. A lemon shaped rock *What is brown and sticky?..A brown stick

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What's the road construction worker's equivalent of a plumbers crack?

An asphalt

Why did the bacon laugh?

Because the egg cracked a yolk.

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How did the farmer find his wife?

He tractor down

What do you call a dictatorship founded on the principles of Ethos, Logos & Pathos?

An Aristotalitarian Regime.

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What do you call a spelling mistake on a map?

A topographical error.

What do you call an earthquake fault?