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What's your opener?

JESUS: "God loves you." You BUDDHA (crumpling paper that says Life Is Suffering): Me too

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Life Jokes More Life Jokes

Why do we all marry?

Because romance is not the only element of life, we should also know horror, terror, suspense, irony, stupidity and tragedy of life!

What is twitter?

3. Twitter is beautiful. 4. What is life

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

Why did Carrie Underwood run out of cheese?

Because Jesus took the wheel.

What did Judas say after capturing Jesus?

Nailed it.

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

What do you call a dark wizard that loves to give hickeys?

A necromancer

What did the Melon King say to the two young melons in love?

They can't-elope.

Paper Jokes More Paper Jokes

How many IT guys does it take to Fix a printer?

Three, one suggests to check if it is plug in, another recommends to reboot the printer, and finally one to check to see if the printer had paper and laugh about how easy the solution was.

Why do they ask you if you would like paper or plastic at the grocery store?

Because baggers can't be choosers,

Suffer Jokes More Suffer Jokes

Why does the addict avoid going to the bank?

Because he suffers from cash withdrawals.

What Did MLK Say When Asked If He Suffered From Jock Itch?

I have a cream.

God Jokes More God Jokes

Why don't you ask Joseph, the carpenter?

God: Uh huge grin cos I'm banging his wife raises hand up top

What do Spanish Muslims call their God?

Ollah!

Buddha Jokes More Buddha Jokes

Who's there! Buddha! Buddha who?

Buddha this slice of bread for me!

What's your opener?

JESUS: "God loves you." You BUDDHA (crumpling paper that says Life Is Suffering): Me too

Opener Jokes More Opener Jokes

What do you call a broken can-opener?

A can't opener.

What's your opener?

JESUS: "God loves you." You BUDDHA (crumpling paper that says Life Is Suffering): Me too

Crumple Jokes More Crumple Jokes

What should we call this portable computer?

SOME GUY: Laptop everyone applauds...w/ tears in my eyes i crumple a paper that says Kneeputer

What u doing?

Math, it's due Friday" *I slowly crumple the paper and put it in my mouth* They'll never believe u