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Whenever we keep the money in the bags our son steals it, I don't know what to do?

Husband: Keep it in his books. I know he will never touch them....

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why is Pizza Hut listed as your emergency contact?

Me: Because if things ever get crazy, they'll know where to find me.

What do I have now?

Oh, I do not know, DIABETES MAYBE!

Bag Jokes More Bag Jokes

What's the difference between a bag of cocaine &amp a small child?

Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out of a window...

What's the difference between a 4 year old boy and a bag of cocaine?

Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out a window.

Son Jokes More Son Jokes

What do you get when you elect Bernie Sander's son as president?

A son Bern

How are a hobo and a balloon alike?

Both are without visible means of support. (My son found that in a children's joke book)

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a millionaire?

A bunny with money.

What is the best way to lose money?

Lend it to Greece.

Steal Jokes More Steal Jokes

What did the farmer say when the police found the gate from the public footpath in his barn and accused him of stealing?

That's not my stile.

What do you call a reckless thief who only steals cooking utensils?

A whisk taker.

Husband Jokes More Husband Jokes

What are your plans for Easter?

Husband: Same as Jesus.. Wife: What do you mean Husband:I will disappear on Friday and reappear on Monday!!

Hows your headache?

Husband: She's fine.

Touch Jokes More Touch Jokes

What will never be read in braille?

Do not touch.

What's up Dad Party!" *dads go nuts* "I wanna know, IS IT GETTING HOT IN HERE?

Dads in unison DON'T TOUCH THE THERMOSTAT

Book Jokes More Book Jokes

What Should Make A Book Teacher: "What Should Be In A Book To Make It A Bestseller?

Jorkens: "A Girl On The Cover & No Cover On The Girl"

What did the doctor do after he finished reading the book?

He removed the appendix!