Whenever we keep the money in the bags our son steals it, I don't know what to do?

Husband: Keep it in his books. I know he will never touch them....

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What happens when a lumberjack doesn't know which tree to cut next?

He gets stumped.

What dinosaur knows the most words?

Thesaurus.

Bag Jokes More Bag Jokes

What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a 4 year-old child?

Eric Clapton never would have let his bag of coke fall out of a 49th-story window!

A grocery store cashier asked if I would like my milk in a bag.

I told her 'No, thanks. The carton works fine.'

Son Jokes More Son Jokes

What is the difference between confident and confidential?

Dad says: "You are my son, I'm confident about that. Your friend over there, is also my son, THAT is confidential."

What did the Mexican firefighter name his two sons?

Jos and Josb

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

Why was the fruit farmer losing money?

He couldn't grow a pear

What do you call a woman who sets all her money on fire?

Bernadette!

Steal Jokes More Steal Jokes

Whenever we keep the money in the bags our son steals it, I don't know what to do?

Husband: Keep it in his books. I know he will never touch them....

Who else would've stolen it?

You think a burglar broke in and was like "Cute top!"

Husband Jokes More Husband Jokes

What did the raisin see when she came home early from work?

Her husband on a date.

Who would you save first?

Wife asks her husband: Honey, If a lion attacks my mother and I, Who would you save first? Husband: Well, the lion!

Touch Jokes More Touch Jokes

What's the scariest thing a blind person can read in Braille?

Danger: Do not touch

What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When an accordion is thrown down the toilet without it touching the sides.

Book Jokes More Book Jokes

What's the oldest trick in the book?

The first one.

What do you call a book filled with outlines of Star Wars characters?

A Kylo Ren Book