Czech Jokes

Why can it be so annoying to drive a Skoda?

The Czech engine light is always on.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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What do you call someone from Olomouc who's living on the dole?

A welfare Czech.

What's an eastern European cannibal's favorite snack?

Czechs Mix

What do you call an abortion in Prague?

A cancelled Czech.

This joke may have profanity.

What happens when your friend from Prague topples over?

You right a Czech.

Why are the best accountants twins from Prague?

Because they always double Czech their work!

What do you call a country that doesn't use credit cards?

A Czech Republic

What do you call it when you get stuck into a shotgun wedding with a Czech?

Checkmate!

Why do slovaks don't like Czechs?

They prefer cash.

Who's there! Czech! Czech who?

Czech before you open the door!

Where did Czechslovakia split up?

At the Czech-out line.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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What do you call a Slavic spouse?

Czech-mate

Why did Bobby Fischer marry a woman from Prague?

He was looking for a Czech mate.

What happened when the bankrupt eastern european jumped off a building?

The Czech bounced.

How did the terrorist get into Czechoslovakia?

They didn't czech his papers.

Why was the chessmaster interested in foreign women?

He wanted a Czech mate.

Who is the chess player's dream companion?

A *Czech Mate*

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Double Jokes More Double Jokes

What is the quickest way to double your money?

Fold it in half!

What happens if you tell a psychiatrist you are schizophrenic?

He charges you double.

Abortion Jokes More Abortion Jokes

Why does Bernie Sanders support abortions?

Because even after he's blown his load he won't pull out.

What do you call a black woman who has had five abortions?

A crime fighter.

Word Jokes More Word Jokes

Why don't black people listen to country music?

Every time the hear the word hoedown they think their sister's been shot.

Why is it so hard to pronounce words in Welsh?

It is the language of Wales.

Cancel Jokes More Cancel Jokes

Whopper at BK You hear BK is now selling a black whopper?

They are already cancelling it because it will never work and everyone wants it for free......

What do people in Prague call abortions?

Canceled Czechs

Right Jokes More Right Jokes

Why did the blonde only smell good on the right side?

She didn't know where to buy Left Guard!

Where was Matthew McConaughey headed in those Lincoln commercials?

Dunno but I'm sure he made all rights all rights all rights.

Door Jokes More Door Jokes

Why does the town idiot take his bedroom door off the hinges and put it to the sid every night when he goes to sleep?

Because he's afraid someone would look through the keyhole.

How do you drown a submarine full of blondes?

Knock on the door

Skoda Jokes More Skoda Jokes

What's the difference between a Porsche and a Skoda?

Paul Walker wouldn't be seen dead in a Skoda.

Why can it be so annoying to drive a Skoda?

The Czech engine light is always on.

People Jokes More People Jokes

What's the difference between my face and my jokes?

People laugh at my face.

Why are people in wheelchairs always getting taken advantage of?

Because they're easy to push around and never stand up for themselves