Dictionary Jokes

How can you tell if a dictionary has been working out?

You can see the definition.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

$19.99

What word in the dictionary is spelled incorrectly?

Incorrectly.

What do they say about a rapper who stole a dictionary?

He got a way with words.

Why are blondes hurt by people's words?

Because people keep hitting them with dictionaries.

Why should you never get into an argument with a dictionary?

Because they'll always have the last word.

Where can you always find money?

In the dictionary.

Why are people still using a dictionary?

I just type the words into Google and see if it corrects me.

What do you call a play about a dictionary?

A pun!

Why can a number divided by zero never be found in the dictionary?

Because it's undefined.

What word in the dictionary is always spelled wrong?

Wrong.

What's the longest word in the dictionary?

Smiles" because there is a mile between each S!

Couple's Daily Question Mug

$19.99

Why did the bodybuilder buy a dictionary?

Because he wanted to get more definition.

You might also enjoy:

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What did Anakin say when the princess asked for his credit card?

Naboo

How do you ask an Uber driver if he drives for Lyft, too?

Do you even Lyft bro?

C O R R E C T L Y Jokes More C O R R E C T L Y Jokes

What 11 letter word does every Yale graduate spell incorrectly?

I n c o r r e c t l y

What is the only word in an English dictionary spelled incorrectly?

Incorrectly is the only word spelled I n c o r r e c t l y

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

What do you call a holy man who works at McDonald's?

A Friar

Why aren't you working?

Me: I didn't see you coming!

Smile Jokes More Smile Jokes

What's the longest verb in the English language?

Smiles. There is a mile between the first and the last letter.

What lies on the bottom of the sea and shakes?

A nervous wreck! I first heard this at xmas 1952 (64 years ago) and it still makes me smile.

Read Jokes More Read Jokes

What did the Irishman text his Wife?

Honey I'm down at the pub having a pint with the lads. Be home in about 30 min. If I'm not back by then please read this message again.

What is the anthem for Scottish Engineers?

"All the Single Laddies" Edit: Read it carefully

Plenty Jokes More Plenty Jokes

Why is Papyrus taller than Sans?

Because Papyrus drinks plenty of milk.

What do you give an elephant with big feet?

Plenty of room!

Word Jokes More Word Jokes

What's the fastest way to ruin free pie?

Put the word 'gluten' at the beginning

What do you call a hurtful play on words?

A Punjab.

Argument Jokes More Argument Jokes

Why shouldn't you ever have an argument with Mobius?

Because they're always so one sided!

Why do vampires hate arguments?

Because they make themselves cross.