Happy Birthday Jokes

What did the time traveler say at the birthday party?

I'd tell you happy birthday, but to me, you've been dead for centuries

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What song should you sing to a wildebeest on his birthday?

Happy Birthday To Gnu!

What do you call a circle of $100 bills?

Aretha Franklins! (Happy birthday to the Queen of Soul!)

What do cows sing at their friends birthday parties?

Happy Birthday to MOO Happy Birthday to Moo

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Cow Jokes More Cow Jokes

Why do you take baths in milk?

I can't find a cow tall enough for a shower.

What do you get when you cross-breed a shark and a cow?

I have no idea but I wouldn't try milking it.

Dad Joke Jokes More Dad Joke Jokes

What do you call a Mexican melon?

A cantelopez! Came up with this on all by myself. I'm a new Dad, so I feel as if I've significantly leveled up my Dad Joke ability.

Where do salt lovers go to pray?

OC The taberNaCl. (Sorry..) (X-posted to dad jokes.)

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

Who are the fastest readers of all time?

9/11 victims, they went through 87 stories in 15 seconds

Why does the French flag have Velcro?

So the blue and red sections are easily removed during a time of war.

Sing Jokes More Sing Jokes

What's the difference between an erection and Colin Kaepernick?

An erection can make it past the semis, and still stand up if you sing for it.

What song do burgers sing on the job?

Gristle While You Work!

Forget Jokes More Forget Jokes

Who's there! Bunny! Bunny who?

Bunny thing is I've forgotten now!kn

Why did the Dairy Queen get pregnant?

The Burger King forgot to cover his whopper

Friend Birthday Party Jokes More Friend Birthday Party Jokes

What does an accountant call a friend's birthday party?

X-post from /r/tax) A present liability!

What do cows sing at their friends birthday parties?

Happy Birthday to MOO Happy Birthday to Moo

Snowman Jokes More Snowman Jokes

Why couldn't anyone trust the snowman to do anything?

He was kinda flakey

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.

Moo Jokes More Moo Jokes

What does a cow ride when his car is broken?

A COW-asaki MOO-torcycle!

Why did the cow cross the road?

Parent: "Wh-" Me: "Moo!"