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Honda Jokes

What does HONDA stand for?

Hold On, Not Done Accelerating.

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What do you get when you wreck a Honda Accord into a Saturn Ion?

An Accordion....I'll, uh, see myself out.

What's the most reliable thing about a Honda?

It's theft rate.

What is it called when a politician craps his pants in a Honda?

Civic doody.

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Bro Jokes More Bro Jokes

What did the chemist say when he caught his brother stealing halogens?

Bro, mine

What meme do Uber drivers hate?

Do you even Lyft, bro?

Kind Jokes More Kind Jokes

What kind of bug wants to buy lawn turf?

A gras shopper.

What kind of pants does the Pink Panther wear?

Denim Denim Denim Denim Denim Denim Deniiiiim

Crap Jokes More Crap Jokes

When the cashier asks me "Is that everything?

I feel like crap inside because obviously my order didn't satisfy her.

Which plant talks the most crap?

Shiitake mushrooms.

Accord Jokes More Accord Jokes

How many times should you try starting your snowblower before you realize it's not going to start?

According to my neighbor it's 458 times.

How is Snow White?

Pretty good according to the 7 dwarfs

Apostle Jokes More Apostle Jokes

What kind of motor vehicles are in the Bible?

A. Honda...because the apostles were all in one Accord.

What car did the Apostles drive?

Hint:Acts 2:1 KJV)

Car Jokes More Car Jokes

Why is the LSU football team like my car?

They both used to have Les (less) Miles!

What do you call a nun in a car?

Virgin Mobile

Politician Jokes More Politician Jokes

Why doesn't God want to argue with Satan?

Because Satan has more politicians to help him.

What did the politicians say after taking a huge bong hit?

What's Allepo

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

Why do they call it the XBOX 360?

Because you turn 360 and walk away!!

What do Dallas Cowboys fans do after they win the Super Bowl?

They turn off their XBOX and go to bed!