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Notice Jokes

What does an Anime Mathlete say?

Notice me 7pi!

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Everyday Deserves a Joke

What do you mean he's your half son?

What do you mean what do I mean?" replied the man. He went on to explain "My son has half my genes, that makes him my half-son." The woman he was talking to decided he was crazy and without replying walked past him. She looked back and noticed his neck was red, after all it was a sunny day.

What Color Is It?

In case you hadn't noticed, the color of the wind is 'blew.' Water always looks 'wet' to me. Dirt is oviously 'dirty.' Soup seems 'soupy.' If you can't find those Crayons in your box, contact CRAYOLA.

Why did no one notice Thor's brother?

Because he was low-key

What did the mathematician's apprentice say when he didn't get acknowledged?

Notice me sin()!!!

What did the tsundere degree say to the radian?

Notice me 10"

What did the fireman say when he noticed his hammer was on fire?

This is not a drill.

What are you looking for buddy?

Normal day at the office, when one guy notices his coworker distraught. He goes over to his cubicle and sees him looking for something on the floor. They spend half an hour looking for it, when the guy starts picking his nose:

How much less could you care?

Coworker: I don't get it. Me: I noticed.

What did the chef say when he noticed his scales were broken?

No weigh...

When does karaoke start?

Him: Never. Me: But I put my "I Karaoke" t-shirt on. Him: We noticed. Me: This is the worst funeral ever.

Love

Love

What was the first thing Hellen Keller noticed at the beach?

The volleyball net.

What did Sean Connery say when he noticed that there wasn't any electricity in the Pennsylvania countryside?

Shomething'sh Amish...

What do you call a swashbuckler when he noticed you?

A senpairate.

Why do you look so sad?

Boy explains his whole problem Girl: Oh, that's why you didn't notice my nail paint

What did the blonde do when she noticed that someone had already written on the overhead transparency?

She turned it over and used the other side.

What does a BYU coed do when she notices people are drinking at a party?

She puts her top back on and leaves.

Why is NATO afraid of Russia?

Cause Russia's been Putin them on notice. Just thought of this.

What phone etiquette?

You hand me your phone, you better believe I'ma hurry & scroll through as many pics as I can before you notice.

When you see geese flying in V formation, have you ever noticed that one side of the V is longer than the other?

Well, there's a reason for that. There are more geese on that side.

Why shouldn't violists take up mountaineering?

Because if they get lost it takes ages before anyone notices that they're missing.

I Love Pizza & You

I Love Pizza & You

What's the deal with Jerry Seinfeld?

Did you ever notice he seems to start off all of his jokes in one of two ways

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Water Jokes More Water Jokes

What's the water polo team's favorite song?

Smoke on the Water, because they are always getting roasted.

How do you lead a horse to water?

With carrots

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Why did Tigger jump down the toilet?

He was looking for Pooh.

Why can't Jesus play Football?

He has flashbacks every time he looks at the goal

Sin Jokes More Sin Jokes

What did the deer first say when he got to church?

Deer God, please forgive me of my sins.

What's the difference between sin and shame?

It is a sin to put it in, but it's a shame to pull it out.

Color Jokes More Color Jokes

What does it mean when a chameleon cant change color?

Reptile - disfunction

What do you call a color that doesn't exist?

A pigment of your imagination.

Pick Jokes More Pick Jokes

How did Canada pick its name?

There were two Canadians and an American. They put letters in a hat and drew. They got "C-eh", "N-eh", "D-eh". The American didn't know what was going on, but he relayed the message. I know i need to work on my execution.

How did Canada name their country?

They picked random letters from a hat. C, eh N, eh D, eh

Reply Jokes More Reply Jokes

What's the wheel for?

The pirate replies, "Arrr it's drivin me nuts!"

How do I get to 280?

A man steps out of line and replies "I guess diet and exercise didn't work!"

Find Jokes More Find Jokes

Where would you find Percy Miller's toothbrush?

In his Master P room.

What did Spock find in the Enterprise Bathroom?

The Captain's Log.

Half Jokes More Half Jokes

How much for that dog?

300$" "What about the half " "I'm sorry, we only sell complete dogs."

Why did the half blind man fall in the well?

Because he couldn't see that well!