Honeydew Jokes

What did the watermelon say to the honeydew?

I'm sorry baby, we just cantaloupe.

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Why did the watermelon and the honeydew decide to cancel their spontaneous wedding in Las Vegas?

They realized with a family like theirs, they really Cantaloupe.

Why won't the honeydew marry the watermelon?

Because they cantaloupe..

Why was the baby Honeydew sad?

Because it was Meloncholic

What did the runaway melon say to the honeydew on Valentine's Day?

I cantaloupe.

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Theirs Jokes More Theirs Jokes

How do you know if an introvert likes you when you're talking to them?

They'll stare at your shoes instead of theirs.

Why did the watermelon and the honeydew decide to cancel their spontaneous wedding in Las Vegas?

They realized with a family like theirs, they really Cantaloupe.

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

What's up in the sky, oh so high?

A baby falling out of an airplane.

How do you make cottage cheese?

You shake a baby.

Realize Jokes More Realize Jokes

What do you have when you just used the toilet and realized there's no toilet paper?

A real mess on your hands.

What did Ghost A say to Ghost B?

Nothing because ghosts don't exist. Edit:Holy crap I just realized I didn't post this on /r/antijokes.

Valentine Day Jokes More Valentine Day Jokes

What do single people call Valentine's Day?

Independence Day

What does a carpet salesman give his wife for Valentine's Day?

Rugs and kisses!

Family Jokes More Family Jokes

When my family says things like...why don't you have kids yet?

I say "Because I didn't get drunk & do the football team, Sasha."

What is the difference between a call center job and a large pizza?

A large pizza can feed a family of four.

Runaway Melon Jokes More Runaway Melon Jokes

What did the plant say to the runaway melons in love?

You cantelope!

What did the runaway melon say to the honeydew on Valentine's Day?

I cantaloupe.

Watermelon Jokes More Watermelon Jokes

How do you get the water in a watermelon?

Plant it in the spring.

Why do watermelons have water in Them?

Because they are planted in the spring!

Marry Jokes More Marry Jokes

Why did the man marry a monkey?

Because he wanted a PRIME-MATE! sorry...sorry twice if this is an old joke

Why don't you get married?

Me: I've never been that hungry.