Instagram Jokes

What is a heroin addict's favorite website?

Instagram.

Everyday Deserves a Joke

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How heavy is a hipster?

One thousand instagrams

How do you weigh a Hipster?

In instagrams

Why was the A.I. afraid of instagram?

Post-upload skepticism

How much does a hipster weigh?

An Instagram.

Why don't Buddhists have Instagram?

They don't believe in the concept of a selfie.

Why was the Instagram star so bad at making coffee?

Because she used #nofilter

What's the best way to be on Instagram and in life?

Selfless

How did the girl with fetal alcohol syndrome tag a picture of herself on instagram?

Nophiltrum

What do you call a reliable coke dealer?

Instagram

Why did Jesus deactivate his Instagram account?

Because he only had 12 followers.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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Why is Instagram not working?

But "Why does the world need another picture of you " #instagramnotworking

Who will I share the sunset with now?

Sobs* Friend: Bad breakup Me: No. *wipes tears* My Instagram isn't working.

How do you make Instagram worthy coffee?

Nofilter

What would you like to Instagram?

How waiters should greet people

What did the girl say when she saw a photo on Instagram of an attractive couple at brunch?

Bae-goals

Why did the creepy hipster get arrested?

Because he was following people before instagram

Where do chicken strips find love?

Chicken tinder Thank you, to Popeye's Louisiana Kitchen's official Instagram for this gem

What about Instagram?

Instagramicide IGicide Instacide Gramicide Instadead Instagone

How much does a hipster weigh?

An instagram.

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Tear Jokes More Tear Jokes

What do you give someone who is about to tear up?

Tape

What starts out happy but ends in tears?

Marriage

Tag Jokes More Tag Jokes

How did the girl with fetal alcohol syndrome tag a picture of herself on instagram?

Nophiltrum

What's the policy at French morgues?

Baguette and tag it.

People Jokes More People Jokes

How can you always be such a happy person?

I never argue with people. - That's impossible! - You're right! That's impossible.

Why don't people get married in North Korea?

Well, all marriages are legal in North Korea, but no one has them because there's no rice to throw.

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

Why is CoD: Infinite Warfare set in space?

Because no one on earth wants to buy it.

Why did the bodybuilder buy a dictionary?

Because he wanted to get more definition.

Hipster Weigh Jokes More Hipster Weigh Jokes

How much does a hipster weigh?

An Instagram.

How much does a hipster weigh?

An instagram.

World Jokes More World Jokes

How many Heros does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

All, to save this world from the darkness.

Why did the customer choose T-Mobile?

Because he wanted the worst cellphone service in the world.

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

What do you call a spider that likes 80s music?

A Durantula.

What kind of pizza does Buddha like?

One with everything.

Concept Jokes More Concept Jokes

Why do credit cards not work in France?

They don't understand the concept of charging.

How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.