Jazz Musician Jokes

What's the difference between a Blues musician and a Jazz musician?

A blues musician plays 3 chords to audiences of thousands. A jazz musician plays thousands of chords to audiences of 3

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What did the DJ say to the jazz musician?

Take me to the airport.

What does a rock artist say to a jazz musician?

To the airport please

How do Jazz musicians drink their liquor?

Straight, No Chaser.

What do you call a jazz musician without a girlfriend?

Homeless

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Airport Jokes More Airport Jokes

Why is Edward Snowden still in Russia?

The airport is Snowden

Why JFK doesn't wear hats?

It is an airport.

Soul Jokes More Soul Jokes

Why is the founder of Comcast going to purgatory?

He met St. Peter at the pearly gates and St. Peter said was, "Please hold. Your soul is very important to us."

Whats the devil's favorite meal?

Fillet of soul

Liquor Jokes More Liquor Jokes

What do a good bar and a woman have in common?

Liquor in the front, poker in the back.

What does a good bar and a good woman have in common?

Liquor in the front poker in the back.

Audience Jokes More Audience Jokes

When are they going to drug test the audience of "The Price Is Right."?

No one should be that happy.

How did you travel such a distance so fast?

I went through a wormhole." Worms in the audience: Omg this is so unrealistic.

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

Why don't orphans play hide and seek?

Because no one will look for them.

Why can't Americans play chess?

Because they are missing two towers.

Dj Jokes More Dj Jokes

Why did the farmer fire the DJ?

Because he kept on dropping beets.

How do know if the person that you have just met is a DJ?

They will tell you.

3 Jokes More 3 Jokes

What has 3 tails 4 trunks and 6 feet?

An elephant with spare parts!el

What are the first 3 words in every authentic Mexican recipe?

Steal a chicken

Thousand Jokes More Thousand Jokes

What do you call a book club that's been stuck on the same book for thousands of years?

Church.

What did the teacher say after spending thousands in the expensive hotel?

I'm sorry to leave now that I've almost bought the place.