Opinion Jokes

What's your opinion on birds?

Well, they're pretty fly if you ask me.

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What's the difference between Pizza and your opinion?

I asked for Pizza #KingOfjokes

What do you get when you mix pie and onions?

Opinions!

What do you call a woman with an opinion?

Wrong.

What did Wiz Khalifa say when he was asked his opinion on the dress?

Yeah, uh huh, you know what it is.

What's your opinion on the mobius strip debate?

I find it a tad one-sided.

When the Little Mermaid became human how did she know how to use a toilet?

BIG-TIME plot hole in my opinion

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Half Jokes More Half Jokes

What do you call an empty bud light can on the side of the road?

A Native American artifact. What do you call a HALF-EMPTY bud light can on the side of the road? An extremely rare Native American artifact.

What's got two legs and bleed a lot?

Half-a-dog!

Dress Jokes More Dress Jokes

What do you call Kanye dressed as Kermit?

I don't know, but it's not Yeezy being green.

What did the vinaigrette say to the refrigerator?

Close the door! I'm dressing!

Daredevil Jokes More Daredevil Jokes

Why can't Daredevil drive a car?

Because he's from New York.

Why wasn't Daredevil in Civil War?

He doesn't work well with Vision

Shoe Jokes More Shoe Jokes

Why did the introvert Polish his shoes regularly?

So he could look at others' faces.

What do you call the belief that one kind of shoe is better than another?

Shoepremacy.

Mix Jokes More Mix Jokes

What do you get when you mix beans and onions?

Tear gas.

What do you get when you mix a dyslexic, an insomniac, and an agnostic?

Someone who lies awake at night wondering if there's a dog

Congratulation Jokes More Congratulation Jokes

What is your opinion on women making 75% of a man's wages for the same job?

I said "Congratulations!!!"

Toilet Jokes More Toilet Jokes

What's blue and sits on the toilet?

A policeman doing his duty!

What is the worst thing anyone can do to a blind man?

Leave a plunger in the toilet!

Pizza Jokes More Pizza Jokes

What kind of pizza do pilots like?

Plain.

How do you get a Harvard graduate off your doorstep?

Tip him for the pizza.