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Phone Bill Jokes

Why are E.T.'s eyes so big?

He saw the phone bill.

Birthday State of Mind

Birthday State of Mind

Why are ET's eyes so big?

He got the phone bill

Why couldn't the baby camel surf the Internet?

Because whenever his parents saw their phone bill they got the hump.

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E.T. Jokes More E.T. Jokes

What's the different between E.T. and a refugee?

E.T. learned English and wanted to go home

Whats E.T.'s first name?

Yodela

Text Jokes More Text Jokes

When people on Facebook say they lost their phone and need everyone's numbers again, I text them: "Guess who?

For 2 weeks.

What do you call a dark or melancholy verse of text?

Poe-etry

State Jokes More State Jokes

Why did the oak tree get his girlfriend pregnant?

Because the state abolished plant parenthood

Which US state is friendliest toward the Japanese?

Ohio

Adele Jokes More Adele Jokes

What did Adele name her sandwich shop?

A deli

What did Adele say when the chicken crossed the road?

Hello from the other side...

1000 Jokes More 1000 Jokes

What do you have when you have 1000 whites skydiving?

Oil

What do you call 1000 aches?

A.

Roamin Jokes More Roamin Jokes

Which punchline do you like better?

What do you call a nun that sleep-walks a) A Roamin' Catholic b) An unconscious habit

What do you call a nun that sleep-walks?

A) A Roamin' Catholic b) An unconscious habit

Mary Jokes More Mary Jokes

What would you do if a bull charged you?

Mary: I'd pay whatever it charged.

How did God get Mary pregnant?

He used the holy immaculate contraception

Internet Jokes More Internet Jokes

What do you call a ghost on the Internet?

E-erie.

What does Gandhi not like on the Internet?

Salt