Portrait Jokes

What did the painter say after finishing a portrait of his brother Andrew?

I drew drew

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What did the artist ask Shakespeare when he was sketching his portrait?

2B or not 2B?

What's the difference between Jesus and his portrait?

His portrait only need one nail

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Andrew Jokes More Andrew Jokes

What did the painter say after finishing a portrait of his brother Andrew?

I drew drew

Who's there! Andrew! Andrew who?

Andrew all her money out of the bank!

Painter Jokes More Painter Jokes

What did the painter say to the paint can?

A lot of good you are. (the joke is that the paint can is empty)

What did the painter do when he was angry?

He made a scene.

Truck Jokes More Truck Jokes

Why can't truck drivers ever fully retire?

Because they can only semi retire.

What's the difference between a ladder and a truck?

It's no bad luck to walk under a truck.

Red Light Jokes More Red Light Jokes

What did the policeman say when he pulled over a nissan?

Nissan Haltima Bonus: What do you call it when a kia pulls up to a red light Kia stoptima

Why didn't you stop at that red light?

Motorist: Then you would have caught up with me.

Artist Jokes More Artist Jokes

How did the artist paint a picture?

Easel-y.

Why did the artists stay away from the irritable blacksmith?

Nobody wanted to draw his iron.

Mexican Jokes More Mexican Jokes

What do Mexicans drink in the morning?

Dos Eggys

What do you call... What do you call four Mexicans standing in quicksand?

Cuatros Cincos

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What were you before you came to school boys and girls?

Asked the teacher hoping that someone would say "babies." She was disappointed when all the children cried out "Happy!"

Whenever I shut down my computer, it asks, "Are you sure you want to shut down your computer?

Then I wonder if it knows something I don't.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

Whats the difference between me and a calendar?

A calendar has dates.

What's the difference between me and a pigeon?

A pigeon can make a deposit on a BMW