Prime Mate Jokes

Why did the man marry a monkey?

Because he wanted a PRIME-MATE! sorry...sorry twice if this is an old joke

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What do you call 2 algebraists who marry?

Prime mates

What did the boy monkey say to the girl monkey?

You're a prime mate!

What did the Gorilla call his first wife?

His prime-mate!

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Monkey Jokes More Monkey Jokes

What do you call a monk that operates a door unlocking service?

A monkey. (p.s. I have a wonderful, terrible love for bad jokes)

What do you do if you fiend King Kong in the kitchen?

Just don't monkey with him.

2 Jokes More 2 Jokes

Who is it?

Police: Police. Me:What do u want Police: To talk. Me: How many r u Police: 2 Me: Talk to each other.

What did the Spanish fireman name his 2 sons?

Jose and Hose B

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What do women want?

She has been talking nonstop for the last two days.

What does a code-switching trilingual Russian say when he wants to increase his bovine supply?

Mas cow.

Gorilla Jokes More Gorilla Jokes

What did the Gorilla do with the apple he was holding in his hands?

He brought it to school and said 'An Ape-lle for the teacher!'

Who is the Gorillas' favourite President of recent years?

Hairy Truman!

Old Joke Jokes More Old Joke Jokes

What is the oldest joke we have on record?

X-post) http://www.reddit.com/r/AskHistorians/comments/2krnv8/whatistheoldestjokewehaveonrecord/

Why did the man marry a monkey?

Because he wanted a PRIME-MATE! sorry...sorry twice if this is an old joke

Marry Jokes More Marry Jokes

Why don't melons marry on a whim?

They cantaloupe.

Which fruit can never get married?

Melons, because they can'telope.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Who did Alaska vote for?

Berrrnie Sanders H/T: wife

What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?

50 pounds.

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

How can you tell if a man is happy?

A. Who cares

How many snowboarders does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

50: 3 to die trying, 1 to actually pull it off, and 46 other to say, "man, I could do that!"