Retirement Jokes

What do mathematicians call retirement?

Aftermath

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How do dogs save for retirement?

With a Ruff IRA.

How did the dungeon keeper plan for retirement?

Collecting stocks and bonds.

What do you call a dog that wisely saves money for retirement?

A 401(K-9).

How do Jedi plan for retirement?

With a Hoth IRA.

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Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

Who loves you more, your wife or your dog?

Lock them both in the trunk of your car for an hour. Guess who is happy to see you when you open the trunk

Why'd the dog sit in the shade?

He didn't want to be a hot dog!

Truck Jokes More Truck Jokes

What happens when you sing a country music song backwards?

You get your wife, truck, and land back.

What kind of sweets do trucks like?

Lorrypops.

Source Jokes More Source Jokes

What do you call a crowd-sourced internet database for turntables?

Wiki-Wiki-Wikipedia

What do we call a wireless mouse?

Hamster.

Retire Jokes More Retire Jokes

What do you call people so good at their jobs, they retire because they did everything?

The mythbusters and ghostbusters.

What did the photographer say when he retired?

I can't take it anymore!

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why do you want to be a librarian?

Me: "I like telling people to be quiet."

Why did the reporter only dunk chips in the middle of the dip?

He just wanted the inside scoop.

Quit Jokes More Quit Jokes

Why did Jesus quit playing hockey?

He kept getting nailed to the boards.

Why did the cyclops quit teaching?

He had only one pupil.

Isis Jokes More Isis Jokes

What's the the key to telling an ISIS joke?

The execution.

What will ISIS be called once it is destroyed?

WasWas

Mathematician Jokes More Mathematician Jokes

How do mathematicians scold their children?

If I've told you n times, I've told you n+1 times...

How does a mathematician get Tan?

Sin/Cos