Shotgun Jokes

What does a blonde and a shotgun have in common?

You break them at the middle and load them from behind

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What sound does a shotgun make?

Cobain Cobain

What do you call a rifle that has been fired recently?

A shotgun

Why can't melons have shotgun weddings?

They cantaloupe

What'd you do this weekend?

I was shooting craps. "Oh you went to a casino " *flashback to blasting dog turds with shotgun* Um, yeah.

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Czech Jokes More Czech Jokes

Why did Bobby Fischer marry a woman from Prague?

He was looking for a Czech mate.

What do you call a country that doesn't use credit cards?

A Czech Republic

Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

What do white girls drink from?

OC Muggs!

What do you call a preponderance of the evidence that your drink has been compromised?

Probable Cosby

Casino Jokes More Casino Jokes

Why did the pig go to the casino?

To play the slop machine!

Why does Cuba not have any casinos?

They Havana no money to spend.

Kurt Cobain Jokes More Kurt Cobain Jokes

How do you know Kurt Cobain didn't have dandruff?

A bit of his head and shoulders were found behind the couch.

Why did people hate going on road trips with Kurt Cobain?

Because he always called shotgun

Weekend Jokes More Weekend Jokes

What do vegetables that go to college do on the weekends?

They Turnip

What would you call the Easter egg roll if Bernie Sanders became president?

Weekend at Bernie's.

Cantaloupe Jokes More Cantaloupe Jokes

What is a virgin's least favorite fruit?

Cantaloupe

Why did the melon get married in a church?

Because he was in love with a cantaloupe.

Kind Jokes More Kind Jokes

When a seeing eye dog poops, who cleans it up?

This is the kind of stuff that makes my head hurt.

What kind of boy is he?

A noughty one.

Flashback Jokes More Flashback Jokes

Why was that guy yelling at you?

Flashback to me ignoring the "one per customer" sign me with a mouthful of cheese samples No idea

How'd the date go?

Not good. Too many red flags. *Flashback to her house being covered with USSR flags* I think she might be a communist.