24 Jokes

How do you turn soup to gold?

Add 24 carrots

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How do you make soup golden?

You add 24 carrots.

What do you call 24 carrots?

Edible gold.

What has 12 breasts and 24 teeth?

The night shift at Waffle House.

How did the dog make gold soup?

He put in 24 carrots.

Why did the mathematician bring home 24 eggs from the grocery store?

Because when he asked his wife how many eggs to buy, she said 4!

What's got 24 balls and screws small animals?

A shotgun shell.

Why was the dyslexic rabbit disappointed when he received the solid gold bar he had ordered via the internet?

He thought the ad said '24 carrots'

How bad are they?

Doctor: It depends, how old are you Patient: I will be 24 soon. Doctor: Pffff, no you won't.

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What are the type of numbers you get when you take an integer and add it to itself?

I can't even

What did the man say who couldn't add the same number to itself?

I can't even...

Gold Soup Jokes More Gold Soup Jokes

How did the dog make gold soup?

He put in 24 carrots.

How do you make gold soup?

Put 14 carrots in it.

Ad Jokes More Ad Jokes

Who clicks on ads?

I do To report them.

Why was the dyslexic rabbit disappointed when he received the solid gold bar he had ordered via the internet?

He thought the ad said '24 carrots'

Grocery Store Jokes More Grocery Store Jokes

What grocery store does Charlie Sheen frequently visit?

Rite Aid

How much is the rent for this amazing apartment?

Ma'am, this is the wine aisle of the grocery store.

Depend Jokes More Depend Jokes

What does it taste like when you go down... What does it taste like when you go down on an old lady?

Depends...

What does 90 year old Pu$$y taste like?

Depends...

Mathematician Jokes More Mathematician Jokes

How did the mathematician solve his constipation problems?

The same way he solved all other problems: He worked it out with a pencil and paper.

How many mathematicians does it take to screw in zero lightbulbs?

Indeterminate

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

What did the house turn into on the night of the full moon?

A Warehouse.

What does it mean to be an Agnostic with insomnia and dyslexia?

You stay up all night wondering if there is a dog.

Order Jokes More Order Jokes

How did the Italians lose WWII?

They ordered ziti instead of shells.

Why did you crash into that stop sign?

Motorist: I was only following orders.