Vest Jokes

What does Dave Grohl say when he thinks there's a stalker in his house?

IS SOMEONE OUT ON THE VEST? THE VEST? THE VEST? THE VESTIBULE?

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What do you call an alligator in a vest?

An investigator!

What did the policeman say to his stomach?

Your under a vest

What did the police officer say to his stomach?

I've got you under a vest.

What do you call a reptile wearing a vest?

An investigator. Ba dum tss.

What do you call an aligator that likes to wear vests when no one else is around?

A private investigator.

What's the difference between an apple?

A bike because a vest has no sleeves.

Why did the alligator wear a vest?

He was an investigator!

What do you call it when you buy stocks of a clothing company?

A good in-vest-ment

What do you call an alligator in a vest?

An in-vest-igator!

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Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Why does John Snow wear a Rolex?

Because he's a man of the nice watch

What do Greek soccer players wear?

Soccer tee's

Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

What are the differences and similarities of flint Michigan and The Walking Dead universe?

They are both post apocalyptic but only one produces brand new cars.

What did the doctor say to the man who walked off the roof of his house?

I don't think you understand the gravity of the situation.

Feminist Jokes More Feminist Jokes

Why do sumo-wrestlers shave their legs?

So they don't get mistaken for feminists.

What do Vegans, ISIS and Feminists have in common?

None of them like pork.

Stalker Jokes More Stalker Jokes

What does Dave Grohl say when he thinks there's a stalker in his house?

IS SOMEONE OUT ON THE VEST? THE VEST? THE VEST? THE VESTIBULE?

What's the difference between a hunter and a stalker?

The hunter has to wait until it's in season!

Bomb Vest Jokes More Bomb Vest Jokes

What's the difference between a bomb vest and a feminist?

A bomb vest does something when it's triggered.

Whats the difference between a feminist and a bomb vest?

A bomb vest does something when triggered.

Apple Jokes More Apple Jokes

How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them!

What is Apple's CEO's favourite TV show?

Lost

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

What's the most important meal of the day to help you lose pounds?

Brexit

What Would Beyonce Do?

Would she apply for a job Nope. She'd just show up one day like "I work here now."

Round Jokes More Round Jokes

How many women have you slept with?

She asked. I said, "Do you want me to round it to the nearest ten " "Oh, I say. Go on then." she laughed. I said, "0."

Who dropped a wad of notes with an elastic band round them?

I did! Well here's the elastic band.