Vest Jokes

What does Dave Grohl say when he thinks there's a stalker in his house?

IS SOMEONE OUT ON THE VEST? THE VEST? THE VEST? THE VESTIBULE?

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What do you call an alligator in a vest?

An investigator!

What did the policeman say to his stomach?

Your under a vest

Why did the rapper die after being shot?

He forgot 2pac his bullet proof vest

What did the police officer say to his stomach?

I've got you under a vest.

What do you call a reptile wearing a vest?

An investigator. Ba dum tss.

What do you call an aligator that likes to wear vests when no one else is around?

A private investigator.

What's the difference between an apple?

A bike because a vest has no sleeves.

Why did the alligator wear a vest?

He was an investigator!

What do you call it when you buy stocks of a clothing company?

A good in-vest-ment

What do you call an alligator in a vest?

An in-vest-igator!

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What's the difference between a Harley and a hoover?

The position of the dirtbag.

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus?

Santa stops after three ho's.

Dave Grohl Jokes More Dave Grohl Jokes

How Dave Grohl spent his night in his hotel room after the concert in Gothenburg, Sweden?

He watched movie Cast Away (starring Tom Hanks) and ate some potato chips.

Why did Dave Grohl buy such a tall house?

He wanted to make sure he was getting the best, the best, the best, the best-a view.

Sleeve Jokes More Sleeve Jokes

What's the difference between an apple?

A bike because a vest has no sleeves.

What do you call a short sleeved British shirt?

A tea-shirt. Please don't hurt me.

Forget Jokes More Forget Jokes

Why did Jesus hang on the cross for three days?

He forgot the safe word.

Why did the blind guy crashed his car into another car?

Because he forgot to check his blind side.

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

What do mathematicians think about exponential functions?

They're radical.

Why did Snow White buy an android phone?

She thought the apple was poisoned.

English Jokes More English Jokes

What does a Mexican have in common with a cue ball?

The harder you hit em' the more English you get outta em'!

What's the difference between a refugee and E.T?

E.T learned English and wanted to go home.

Policeman Jokes More Policeman Jokes

What do you call a hotel special that lets policemen stay for two nights for the price of one?

CuNO3!

What did the policeman say to his stomach?

Your under a vest

Pregnant Wife Jokes More Pregnant Wife Jokes

What happens if the baby pees?

Pregnant wife: She won't. She waits till she's born 5: Right. Just like no one pees in the pool

Why do I have a temperature of 101.3?

Me: Maybe you're pregnant Wife: What's wrong with you *damn you webMD, damn you.