Live Jokes

Where do cows like to live?

St. Moo-is.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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Why do old people prefer to live in one story houses?

There close to the ground.

What is the least pleasant state to live in?

Missouri.

Where does the zombie president live?

In the wight house.

Where do Chinese people live?

Chinatown

Why is it illegal for a person living in Virginia to be buried in Texas?

Because they're still alive.

What would romantic living dead movie be called?

Zombaes

Why doesn't Aaron want to get out of the water, even though he is hydrophobic?

Because he enjoys living in denial.

What do you call a bee that lives in America?

A USB.

What kind of dog lives in a particle accelerator?

A Fermilabrador Retriever.

What’s the advantage of living in Switzerland?

Well, the flag is a big plus.

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Everyday Deserves a Joke

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Why are fish so smart?

Because they live in schools!

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Black Life Jokes More Black Life Jokes

Why did Black Lives Matter arrange a protest on Coruscant?

Because Mace Windu nuffin

How many states of matter are there?

5: solids, liquids, gases, plasma, and black lives

Light Bulb Jokes More Light Bulb Jokes

How many ladybugs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, but don't ask me how they got in there.

How many Dell Service Reps does it take to change a light bulb?

I don't know, I am on hold.

Protester Jokes More Protester Jokes

What happens if the protesters in Egypt win?

They advance to the finals against Tunisia.

How many protesters does it take to change a lightbulb?

TRICK QUESTION. THEY CAN'T CHANGE ANYTHING**

Mississippi Jokes More Mississippi Jokes

What's the best part of living in Alabama?

You don't live in Mississippi.

What do you call a hippie's wife?

Mississippi

Purple Man Jokes More Purple Man Jokes

What did the purple policeman say as he threw the purple man into jail?

INDIGO!

Who lives there?

The yellow man lives in the yellow house. The purple man lives in the purple house. The red man in the red house. And the blue man in the blue house. So who lives in the White House? The black man. It's better in person, I'm so sorry.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do you know you're drinking too many protein shakes?

You've had whey too much!

When a dad drives past a graveyard: Did you know that's a popular cemetery?

Yep, people are just dying to get in there

Doctor Jokes More Doctor Jokes

Who's the laziest doctor at the hospital?

Doctor Dolittle

What does a Doctor do when he needs 50 bags full of fruits?

He goes to Orlando and checks the Pulse.

Black Guy Jokes More Black Guy Jokes

What is long and hard for a black guy?

Third grade

How do you know a black guy's been at your computer?

It's not there.