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Sleep Pill Jokes

Why did the blonde tip toe near the medicine cabinet?

Because she didn't want to wake the sleeping pills!

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Why did the old man sneak past the cupboard?

He didn't want to wake up the sleeping pills.

Why should you be quiet in a pharmacy?

In case you wake the sleeping pills!

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Pill Jokes More Pill Jokes

Why do blondes prefer the pill instead the condom?

Because it's waaay easier to swallow

What do you call movie night at Bill Cosby's house?

Netflix and pill

Elephant Jokes More Elephant Jokes

What do you get when you cross and elephant with a giraffe?

Elephantgiraffesin()

Why did the elephant sit on the marshmallow?

So that he didn't fall in the hot cocoa.

Pharmacy Jokes More Pharmacy Jokes

Where do farm animals get their groceries?

The pharmacy.

What do you call that part of the pharmacy where they keep the condoms, birth-control pills, etc.?

The Contrasection.

Cupboard Jokes More Cupboard Jokes

Why did the old man sneak past the cupboard?

He didn't want to wake up the sleeping pills.

What do you get if you cross a bag of snakes and a cupboard of food?

Snakes and Larders!sna

Old Man Jokes More Old Man Jokes

Why did the old man hate living next to the tennis courts?

He couldn't stand all the racket!

What did the woman from Finland say after seeing an old man fall in the water, knowing he couldn't swim?

Oh no, Helsinki! He Finnish!

Case Jokes More Case Jokes

Why do golfers bring an spare change of pants?

Just in case they get a hole in one. Credit to

Why is it always a good idea to pack asparagus when you go camping?

In case your other agus breaks.

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

How can you shorten a bed?

Don't sleep long in it.

When I was just a little girl, I asked my mother what will I be. Will I be pretty, will I be rich?

Here's what she said to me: GO TO SLEEP.

Wake Jokes More Wake Jokes

What did the overweight woman say to Buffalo Bill when she woke up?

I can't feel my face when I'm with you...

How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You pa- pa- poker face, pa- pa- poker face!