3 Year Old Jokes

Why do men carry condoms instead of women?

Because by the time women found a condom in their purses, kid would be 3 years old

This joke may have profanity.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What colour is eight?

Purple (According to my 3 year old son)

Why did the 3 year old go to jail?

For resisting a rest.

What did I do in my 3-year-old?

I ate sand.

What's wrong?

3-year-old: NOTHING! Phew! she's already a woman

Why are you always tired, Dad?

My 3-year-old asked as she woke me from a nap by poking me in the eye.

What sound do dogs make?

3-year-old: Woof woof. Me: Horses 3: Neigh. Me: Pigs 3: Sizzle sizzle. Somebody understands bacon.

When I was 3 years old I looked at my nutsack and asked my Mom "Are these my brains?

Not yet," she replied

What does that cloud look like to you?

3-year-old: A cloud. Me: No, what do you imagine it could be 3-year-old: Rain.

What did you do at preschool?

3-year-old: We had to color inside the lines the WHOLE time. Me: 3-year-old: I need to lie down.

Why does the house only have one window?

Cheeseburger (joke from my 3 year old neice this evening)

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What did you get me for Mother's Day?

3-year-old: A cake. Wife: Where is it 3: You haven't made it yet.

You might also enjoy:

Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

When does a joke stop being funny?

When you repost it.

What happened when Helium told a joke?

There was no reaction

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What do you call it when your wife brings you rice porridge in prison?

Congee-gal visit

How the fight started Wife: Going for a walk, do you want anything?

Me: How about a newspaper. Wife: OK, which one Me: Today's.

Horse Jokes More Horse Jokes

Why is it good that accordionists have a half-ounce more brains than horses?

So they don't disgrace themselves in parades.

What has two heads, four eyes, six legs, and a tail?

A horse and rider.

Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

What do you get when you mix a dyslexic, an insomniac, and an agnostic?

Someone who lies awake at night wondering if there's a dog

Why shouldn't you believe a person in bed?

Because he is lying.

Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

What do you call a snake that always hangs around its mom?

A momma's boa.

Why do people congratulate you when Mom is the one making the baby?

Me: I helped 5: How Me: 5: Me: I read her the instructions

Accord Jokes More Accord Jokes

What is ISIS's favorite smartphone?

Samsung Note 7, according to them it's "the bomb" nowadays.

How do librarians file melted marshmallows?

According to the Gooey Decimal System.

Understand Jokes More Understand Jokes

What do you call a kleptomaniac who doesn't understand figurative speech?

Someone who takes everything literally

What do you get if you cross a Sociologist with someone in the Mafia?

An offer you can't understand.

Brain Jokes More Brain Jokes

What is a zombies' favorite food?

Brains. What is a dyslexic zombies' favorite food Brians.

What type of brain does a plant have?

A membrane