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Admit Jokes

What's the worst part about admitting to your friends and family you play PokemanGo?

Having to admit you have autism:,P

We've Got This Love Thing Down

We've Got This Love Thing Down

What do you call it when you admit to being a prisoner?

A con-fession.

What does a pediatrist do when you ask them which body part they find most interesting?

They admit de feet.

Why didn't the movie ticket get convicted of both of its crimes?

It would only admit one.

Why did the vegetable thief get a lighter sentence?

Because he admitted the crime was *parsley* his fault.

Why can Egyptian crocodiles never admit when they are wrong?

They're always in de Nile.

Why did eighteen blondes go to the movies together?

They heard that under seventeen weren't admitted!

What do you call it when someone admits to caring about how they dress?

A confashion.

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Egyptian Crocodile Jokes More Egyptian Crocodile Jokes

Why can Egyptian crocodiles never admit when they are wrong?

They're always in de Nile.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What did the commitment averse monster truck announcer say to his girlfriend when she asked him, "When are you going to finally ask me to marry you?

SOMEDAY ###SOMEDAY! ###SOMEDAY!!

What's the difference between "Fake News" and CNN?

I don't know Reddit, that's why I'm asking you

Care Jokes More Care Jokes

Why did Billy not care who he offended while posting on the internet?

Because the ends justify the memes

How much less could you care?

Coworker: I don't get it. Me: I noticed.

Find Jokes More Find Jokes

Why is everyone in an Internet cafe hungry?

Server Not Found.

Why do you never find elephants hiding in trees?

Because they are really good at it.

Bad Jokes More Bad Jokes

What's the worst part about meeting someone with Parkinson's?

Shaking hands.

What's the worst part about having Comcast internet?

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De Nile Jokes More De Nile Jokes

Why is it really hard to convince Egyptians?

Because they all live in de-Nile...

Why can Egyptian crocodiles never admit when they are wrong?

They're always in de Nile.

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

What game do French schoolchildren like to play?

Simon 16

What's the difference between a pun and a copy of Cliff's Notes?

A pun is a play on words, while Cliff's notes are a word on plays

Light Sentence Jokes More Light Sentence Jokes

Why did the agnostic receive a lighter sentence?

He had no prior convictions.

Why did the vegetable thief get a lighter sentence?

Because he admitted the crime was *parsley* his fault.