Archaeologist Jokes

Why are all the archaeologists single?

Because they cant find dates

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What do you call Kurt Russel playing an archaeologist?

Kurt Fossil

Why is the archaeologist depressed?

Some old stuff just got dug up

Why is the archaeologist sad?

Because his career is in ruins.

Why did the archaeologist ask a diamond out to dinner?

Because of his enthusiasm for Carbon-Dating.

Who is an archaeologist?

One whose career is in ruins.

Why did the archaeologist go bankrupt?

Because his career was in ruins

What's an archaeologist?

Someone whose career is in ruins.

What is an archaeologist?

Someone who's career is in ruins!

How many archaeologists does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to change it while the other two argue about how old the old one is.

How many archaeologists does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to change it while the other two argue about how old the old one is.

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How do you depress a room full of geeks?

Hold the door! I'm a leaf on the wind!

Why was the airport depressed?

It had a terminal illness.

People Jokes More People Jokes

What's the best thing about dark humor?

People don't take it lightly.

Why are birthday's good for you?

Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest!

Light Bulb Jokes More Light Bulb Jokes

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Need to know ASAP.

How many UPM's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None! If you'd just make it a day exterior we wouldn't be screwing around with all these damn light bulbs!

Career Jokes More Career Jokes

Why couldn't the dolphin choose a career?

She had no sense of porpoise.

How did the geologist develop a career as an expert in sinkholes?

He fell into it.

Bone Jokes More Bone Jokes

Who's there! Bones! Bones who?

Bones upon a time...!

How do skeletons kiss?

They don't. Skeletons don't have lips, they just bone.

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

Why does Sia live in a low-rent apartment?

She loves cheap bills

What did you hear about the tree who was in love?

He pined everyday.

Old Jokes More Old Jokes

How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven one to change and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.

How do you know when it's time to get a new dishwasher?

When the old one expects you to "do your share"

Change Jokes More Change Jokes

How many homophobes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None. They don't accept change, even if it means a brighter world.

Why doesn't Shirley Manson change her Facebook relationship status?

She's only happy when "It's Complicated."