Beer Jokes

How do you change root beer in to a beer?

Put it in a square cup

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What does an alcoholic do when he is out of beer?

Wine

What do you say to a Blonde that won't give in?

"Have another beer."

What am I gonna do with a river?

Could you cry me a beer

What happens to a woman who falls down the stairs?

Nothing, as long as she doesn't drop my beers

Why didn't Ahmadinejad have a beer?

He wasn't in the MahMoud.

What's the difference between a beer and a down syndrome kid?

If you end up with a badly poured beer you can blow it's head off.

What's the difference between having a badly poured draft beer and having a child with Down's Syndrome?

If the head's too big on your beer, you can blow it off.

Why are bunnies so good at brewing?

Cause beer is made with hops.

What is a toad's favorite kind of beer?

One with a lot of hops.

What is the difference between wealth and poverty?

And the dad says: 'Wealth is caviar, champagne and women. Poverty is hot pocket, beer and your mother!'

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

A ham sandwhich walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says...

I'm sorry, we don't serve food here

A DHCP packet walks into a bar and asks for a beer.

Bartender says, "here, but I’ll need that back in an hour!"

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Buck Jokes More Buck Jokes

What does it cost for a pirate to get his ear pierced?

A buck-an-ear

What's the difference between Beernuts and Deernuts?

Beernuts are $8.95 and Deernuts are under a buck!

Ex Jokes More Ex Jokes

What do designers of gum call new flavors from old ingredients?

Ex-spearmints

What should you do when your ex-girlfriend stands in the spotlights?

Drive faster.

Lunch Jokes More Lunch Jokes

Why did the Australian pirate refuse lunch?

Because he had Somalia.

What do elephants in the zoo get for lunch?

Half an hour, just like the rest of the animals.

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

What did Frankenstein's monster say when he was struck by lightning?

Thanks I needed that.

Why did the stressed out zombie go on vacation?

He needed some time to himself to decompose.

Add Jokes More Add Jokes

How do you stir up the politics in a Coca Cola drink?

You add ices.

Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator?

She couldn't find the 10 key.

Bring Jokes More Bring Jokes

How many Aquarians does it take to change a lightbulb?

A hundred but they'll all be competing to be the one to change the bulb and bring light to the world.

Why doesn't Elin Nordegren ever shop at the fish market?

Because Tiger is always bringing home crabs!

Beer Nut Jokes More Beer Nut Jokes

What's the difference between... deer nuts and beer nuts?

Beer nuts are over a dollar deer nuts are under a buck. (old but good)

What is the difference between deer nuts and beer nuts?

Deer nuts are under a buck.

Open Jokes More Open Jokes

Who's there! Belle! Belle who?

Belle-t up and open this door!

Why couldn't the man open a fish and herb shop?

Because he didn't have the thyme or the plaice.