Christmas Jokes

What types of trees never get Christmas presents?

Knotty Pines.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

What did the kid with no arms get for Christmas?

I dont know, hes still trying to kick it open.

What did the banker get for Christmas?

My 401k

What's the most popular wine at Christmas?

I don't like sprouts!

How do you make a blonde laugh at Easter?

Tell her a joke at Christmas

What is the cow's holiday greeting?

Mooooory Christmas!

What did the ghosts say to Santa Claus?

MIKE: We'll have a boo Christmas without you.

What did Jamal get for Christmas?

Your Bike

Why are people who suffers from insomnia so excited at the moment?

They only have to sleep 3 more times until Christmas

Why do programmers always mix up Halloween and Christmas?

Because Oct 31 == Dec 25

How did Darth Vader know what Luke was getting for Christmas?

He felt his presents.

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Everyday Deserves a Joke

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Eve Jokes More Eve Jokes

What did God say after she made Eve?

Practice makes perfect.

What did Adam say the day before Christmas?

It's Christmas, Eve!

Adam Jokes More Adam Jokes

What did Adam say to Eve on Christmas?

It's Christmas, Eve.

What time of day was Adam born?

Just a little before Eve

Day Christmas Jokes More Day Christmas Jokes

What did Adam say the day before Christmas?

It's Christmas, Eve!

What did Adam say to his wife on the day before Christmas?

It's Christmas, Eve!

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What do they call deers in space?

I don't know, they would probably die anyways.

How do you tell two witches apart?

You can't! You don't know which witch is which!

Sheep Jokes More Sheep Jokes

Why did the sheep move house?

The neighbours were baaastsrds.

What did the sheep use to shave before his wedding?

Elopping shears

Charlie Sheen Jokes More Charlie Sheen Jokes

What's the difference between the Notre Dame Fighting Irish and Charlie Sheen?

Charlie Sheen's winning.

What do you call Charlie Sheen's brother if he were a financial advisor?

Emilio Investevez. Fun game/running joke friends in college used to play. Wondering if Reddit would enjoy the game too.

Martin Luther King Jokes More Martin Luther King Jokes

Why does Martin Luther King like jam?

Because God bless America

What is Martin Luther King's least favorite Christmas song?

I'm dreamin' of a white Christmas