Concrete Jokes

What do British people call concrete?

Arsephalt

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What did the fish say when he hit concrete?

Dam(n).

What does a fish say when he hits concrete?

Dam! A customer told me that joke, equipped with an " old guys rule" shirt and a hardy fist bump.

What did David Crockett say when he looked over the Alamo wall and saw 3000 Mexicans?

Hey I didn't know we were pouring concrete today.

How can you a drop a egg on concrete without cracking it?

Anyway you want. Concrete doesn't break easily.

Why did the prison board decide to build the new prison out of concrete?

The old one was made of steal.

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Why did the man keep reloading the picture of the candy cane at the potluck?

He was in charge of refresh mints.

Who does Luke Skywalker ask to charge his lightsaber?

Char-Jar Binks

Shirt Jokes More Shirt Jokes

How do you know a shirt has phoned you?

Collar ID

What did the shirt say to the pants?

What's up, britches.

Dam Jokes More Dam Jokes

What'd the fish say when he ran into a wall?

Dam!

Why are boats being driven into the side of the lake?

It's ram a dam

Alamo Jokes More Alamo Jokes

What did David Crockett say when he looked over the Alamo wall and saw 3000 Mexicans?

Hey I didn't know we were pouring concrete today.

Why did the Mexican Army only bring 5000 soldiers to the Alamo?

They only had 2 vans

Thank Jokes More Thank Jokes

Why do the French have so many civil wars?

So they can win one every now and again. (Thanks, John Cleese! This was too good not to share.)

Why don't North Koreans listen to funk?

Cos they've got no Seoul! Thank you very much.

Customer Jokes More Customer Jokes

Why did Renault name a car "Le Car"?

So customers wouldn't accidentally drive Le Lawnmower to work.

Why don't many customers go to the tea house?

Because the prices are so steep

Today Jokes More Today Jokes

What does the internet need to take when its constipated?

Google Fiber Note: Randomly came up with this joke today

What would Elvis Presley be doing if he were alive today?

Scratching at the inside of his coffin.

British Jokes More British Jokes

What is a British person's favorite cereal?

Cheerios. say it in a British accent

What did the British proton say after 5 cups of coffee?

I feel positively charged!