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Drain Jokes

What happened to r/showerthoughts?

They went down the drain.

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Everyday Deserves a Joke

What fuels electronics but drains a relationship?

Battery

Why are Plumbers always so tired?

Because their job is draining.

What did the fish say to the man draining its aquarium?

WATER YOU DOING

Why couldn't the poop get flushed down the drain?

Because it was deterred.

Why are dyslexic zombies such good plumbers?

Because they're always looking for drains.

Why's the sink depressed?

It's been feeling drained

What did the gentleman say to the doctor when he went to get his pus drained?

Please! I in cyst!

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Connect Jokes More Connect Jokes

When The NSA is Monitoring Your Computer?

The power is on and you're connected to the internet.

What's the difference between a USB and the USA?

One connects to all your devices and accesses your data, the other is a harware standard.

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

What are your desires?

Me: My desires are..imagines having a talking Pug named Maurice that I watch Netflix with...Unconventional.

Which plant talks the most crap?

Shiitake mushrooms.

Lawyer Jokes More Lawyer Jokes

What's the difference between Justin Bieber and a lawyer?

Some adults like lawyers.

What is it called when two lawyers are fighting?

Civil War

Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

A SQL query walks into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks...

'Can I join you?'

Who do you call about stray cats walking around your yard?

Brian Setzer

Case Jokes More Case Jokes

Why Did The Cows Go To Graze In The Marijuana Fields?

It was a case of the pot calling the cattle back...

What's the deal with my laptop?

I'm sitting there typing and the battery drains, does this ever happen to you? So this little message pops up: Plug in or find another power source. Do you get that message? What other power source are they talking about? Well, I can't find that cable, so I'll go ahead and plug in to the hamster wheel generator I keep just in case. That's my other power source.

Poop Jokes More Poop Jokes

What does a witch take when she can't poop?

Hexlax

How do you guys tweet from the toilet?

I poop with both hands.

Construction Site Jokes More Construction Site Jokes

What do you call 10 Mexican kids in a school?

A construction site

Why is it dangerous for a lawyer to walk onto a construction site when plumbers are working?

Because they might connect the drain line to the wrong suer.

Flush Jokes More Flush Jokes

Why did the little boy flush a pencil down the toilet?

Because it was a Number 2.

Why does Marx's toilet play a sonata when flushed?

Because of the violins inherent in the cistern.