Failure Jokes

What do you call an unborn child that is excessively ready to accept failure?

A defetus

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What do a frozen beer, a burnt pizza, and a pregnant girl have in common?

Failure to pull out in time

Why is it not a good idea to tell your parents about your failures while they are on an elevator?

It would cause them to be disappointed on many different levels.

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Vegetable Jokes More Vegetable Jokes

Which part of a vegetable is the hardest to chew?

The wheelchair

What vegetable has Avoidant Personality Disorder?

Lettuce alone!*

Udder Failure Jokes More Udder Failure Jokes

What do you call a cow which can no longer produce milk?

An udder failure.

What do you call a cow that can't make milk?

An udder failure!

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

How do you stop a 200 pound hamster from charging?

Take away it's credit cards.

What's the difference between Marty Mcfly and a Bears fan?

Eventually, Marty Mcfly stopped going back to 1985.

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Whats the complement to a 40 degree angle?

My you're looking "acute" today.

What's an extroverted accountant?

One who looks at your shoes while he's talking to you instead of his own.

Bereave Jokes More Bereave Jokes

Why didn't the Asian man cry when his wife died?

Because he just couldn't bereave it.

How did the Chinese atheist get to heaven?

Jesus said to him "Behold! I am risen!" and he said "That's nice I don't bereave you."

Burn Jokes More Burn Jokes

Why are Mistborns always so thin?

Because they're always Burning calories!

What do you call a politician in a house fire?

Burning Sanders!

Burn Pizza Jokes More Burn Pizza Jokes

What do a burnt pizza, a frozen beer, and a pregnant woman have in common?

In all 3 cases, someone forgot to pull it out.

What do a burnt pizza, frozen beer, and a pregnant girl have in common?

Someone didn't pull it out in time.

Steven Hawking Jokes More Steven Hawking Jokes

How does Steven Hawking refresh after a long work day?

F5 (sorry Imgoingtohellforthis)

What's black and sits at the top of a staircase?

Steven Hawking after a house fire.