Lego Jokes

Where does the Lego man get his drugs?

His K'Nex!

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How do you measure a Lego minifigure's shoe size?

In square feet.

How do you measure a Lego figure's shoe size?

In square feet.

Why was the Lego boxer unmatched in the ring?

He was a master of blocking attacks.

How late?

Cut to me trapped inside a tiny house made from Lego* I've no idea to be honest with you...

What'd u ask Santa for 6: a speed boat M: like a Lego boat?

6: no M: oh for the bath 6: no M: the pool 6: *doesnt break eye contact* no

What's worse than stepping on a Lego in the middle of the night?

A landmine.

Why do adults like Legos so much, when they grow old?

They can't lego of their childhood. Tell some more Lego puns, here!

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Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What did the boy tell the priest in the confessional?

Nothing. It's rude to talk with your mouth full.

How can you tell the Ethiopian diplomat at a political function?

He's the one with the gold Rolex around his neck.

Throw Jokes More Throw Jokes

Why did little timmy fall off his bike?

Because someone threw a canoe at him!

What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you?

RUN! She's got a grenade in her mouth!

Hospital Jokes More Hospital Jokes

What part of the hospital does John Cena hate the most?

The ICU

What did they call Glenn Frey when he was in the hospital?

An Illeagle

Adult Jokes More Adult Jokes

What body part do adults have two of and children have four of?

Kidneys.

What are children generally better at then adults?

Giving the pope an errection

Hate Jokes More Hate Jokes

Why does Michael Scott hate Hamlet?

Toby or not Toby

Why does the corn hate the farmer?

Because he picks his ears!

Win Jokes More Win Jokes

What did the Japan team say after the first half of the Women's World Cup?

I, 4-1, know we won't win.

Who won the Tour de France in 1940?

The Sixth German Panzer Division

Nominate Jokes More Nominate Jokes

What's the real reason Lego Movie didn't get nominated for an Oscar?

They thought it was called "The Leo Movie".

What is the best stand-up routine of our time?

I nominate Chris Rock's Never Scared.

Lego Man Jokes More Lego Man Jokes

Where does the Lego man get his drugs?

His K'Nex!

Why do LEGO men hate going to hospital...?

Because plastic surgery costs a fortune!