Leper Jokes

How could a leper afford a nice house?

It cost an arm and a leg

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How does the leper give directions?

It's straight ahead, just my finger".

Why did the leper fail his driving test?

He left his foot on the clutch.

What do you call a leper in a jacuzzi?

Stew. Bonus: what do you do if an epileptic jumps into a jacuzzi? You throw in your laundry.

Why did the leper return to the shower?

He forgot his head and shoulders.

What's the difference between a leper and a tree?

A tree has limbs.

What did one leper say to another?

Got yer nose!

What happened when the lepers played poker?

One guy threw down his hand and another laughed his head off. This was my best friend's favorite joke when she was little apparently.

What do you call two lepers in a spar?

Soup

What's the fastest way to make a skeleton?

Put a leper in a wind tunnel

Why did the leper crash his car?

He left his foot on the accelerator.

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Laundry Jokes More Laundry Jokes

What is the most racist house chore?

Laundry, because you have to sort the whites from the colors.

Which president likes doing laundry?

George WASHING-A-TON. He's the 8 year old white Kevin Hart.

Clutch Jokes More Clutch Jokes

What do you call a group of cars?

A clutch!

Why did the leper fail his driving test?

He left his foot on the clutch.

Mix Jokes More Mix Jokes

What do you get when you mix a dog and a tulip?

A collieflower

What do you get when when you mix cocaine and LSD?

Time

Stew Jokes More Stew Jokes

What do you call 4 lepers in a jacuzzi?

Stew

What do you call a leper in a jacuzzi?

Stew. Bonus: what do you do if an epileptic jumps into a jacuzzi? You throw in your laundry.

Cancel Jokes More Cancel Jokes

What club cancels their meeting everytime?

The vegan club

What can I bring to your party?

Friend: A six pack. does 10 crunches cancels

Saint Patrick Day Jokes More Saint Patrick Day Jokes

What's the difference between Saint Patrick's Day and Martin Luther King Day?

Everyone wants to be Irish on Saint Patrick's Day.

What do you get when you mix a leper and a con man?

A lepercon. (In honor of Saint Patrick's Day.)

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did the gamer start working out?

He wanted to finally get respecced.

What did the Baskin-Robbins manager say to the employee that wanted to date a co-worker?

Don't poop where you scoop.

Girl Jokes More Girl Jokes

What's the best time of this month for vampires?

It depends on the girl

What's the difference between arguing with a girl and arguing with a knife?

The knife has a point