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Mac Jokes

Why was Mac OS X hired as the prison guard?

Because he kept locking up.

$Your Age Is Only Math$

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Your Age Is Only Math

Why did Eric Clapton switch from PC to Mac?

He had a bad experience with windows.

Why do Mac users have such high electricity bills, but low gas bills?

They don't have windows.

Why can't a Mac sing?

Because it's not Adele

How do Jedis close their programs on a Mac?

They use Force quit.

What do you call Dubstep on a Mac?

IDropIt

What's the Difference Between Steve Jobs and Bill Gates?

Bill Gates never got a Mac, but Steve Jobs got PC.

How is a Mac like a Queen's guard?

They're both run by Unix.

What's an Apple Scottish self-aware computer called?

I, Mac.

What do armed forces at sea feel when depressed?

The Navy blues What part of the Mac's desktop would seafarers miss when at sea for a loooong time The Dock

Why did the farmer hang raincoats all over his orchard?

Someone told him he should get an apple Mac

We've Got This Love Thing Down

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We've Got This Love Thing Down

Why do white girls like Apple?

Because once go Mac you never go back.

What's a Scottish cannibal's favorite food?

Mac in cheese

What's the best way to accelerate a Mac?

9.81 m/s2

Why did Eric Clapton move from PC to Mac?

He had a bad experience with Windows

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Window Jokes More Window Jokes

Why did we skip windows 9?

Because 7 8 9 I'm so sorry

What does my girlfriend and Windows 8 have in common?

They are both 8........

Unix Jokes More Unix Jokes

What operating system does Varys have on his computer?

Unix

What was written on the UNIX user's doormat?

There's no place like cd

Mac Os X Jokes More Mac Os X Jokes

Why was Mac OS X hired as the prison guard?

Because he kept locking up.

What do you get when you have Windows and Mac OS X dual booting from the same computer?

A co-operating system.

Lock Jokes More Lock Jokes

What did the knob say to the door?

I LOCK you a lot! yep, its corny, indeed, but... I'm tryin'! Skip

What kind of cell phone doesn't have a lock?

A Nokia

Queen Jokes More Queen Jokes

What do you get when you cross the Queen and Prince Charles?

Dead in a tunnel.

Who's gonna be the next queen of R&ampB?

I don't know yet but she's gonna be Beyondce!

Jedi Jokes More Jedi Jokes

Where do Jedi go to get inked?

Tattooine.

Why don't Jedi mathematicians use the absolute value function?

Because only a Sith deals in absolutes.

Depress Jokes More Depress Jokes

Why is depressed clothing so convenient?

It hangs itself

Why was the dolphin happy and the shark depressed?

The sharks life lacked porpoise.

Miss Jokes More Miss Jokes

What do you call an octopus that's missing one tentacle?

Octopus Prime.

What did JFK Jr miss most about Martha's Vineyard?

The runway