Mature Jokes

How can you tell if you have a mature or an immature sense of humor?

Poop.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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What's the difference between a drummer and publicly traded stock?

Publicly traded stock will mature and make money.

What Austrian girls and wine have in common?

Both mature in a cellar.

What is the difference between a guitar player and government bonds?

Government bonds mature over time and earn money

What's the difference between a millennial and a mutual fund?

A mutual fund will eventually mature and make money

What's the difference between a guitar player and a savings bond?

Eventually the savings bond will mature and begin to earn money.

Why women mature faster than men?

Because men start growing breasts only after 40 years old.

What is a Mature man who likes young women?

An Inmate

What's the difference between men and government bonds?

Bonds mature.

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Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

What do you call a kid who tells bad jokes?

A redditor

What type of punch hurts kids the most?

A sandy hook

Trade Jokes More Trade Jokes

What's the difference between a drummer and publicly traded stock?

Publicly traded stock will mature and make money.

Why did the chicken go to the car dealership?

She wanted to trade the coop for a sedan..

Chinese Jokes More Chinese Jokes

What would you get if you crossed the Easter Bunny with Chinese food?

Hop suey!

What part of your punctuality emancipates the Chinese?

Your Ti"ming"!

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What does a Chicago police officer and a professional skateboarder have in common?

They both shred footage. (*be gentle, it's my first time.*)

Why is hip hop popular among urban youth?

Because it's the only time a black man can tell a crowd of white people to put their hands in the air.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What do women and rocks have in common?

You can skip the flat ones.

Why do women love the smell of babies so much?

Because 50% of the taste is in the smell.

Guitar Player Jokes More Guitar Player Jokes

How do you get a guitar player to turn down his amp?

Give him sheet music.

What's the best way to get your guitar player to turn down the volume?

Give him the sheet music.

Bond Jokes More Bond Jokes

What's that jabbing me in the gluteus maximus?

Bond: my PPK Money Penny: 'K

What does a blonde woman is doing with her ear bonded to the wall?

Listening.

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

Why do Greeks like fried foods?

Because they're greasy

Whenever I get to a restaurant and they say there is a wait I say "do you know who I am?

Because while I wait I like to be introspective