Miss Piggy Jokes

Why can't Kermit and Miss Piggy count to one hundred?

Because every time they get to 69, Miss Piggy gets a frog in her throat.

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Why was Miss Piggy sick for her show?

There was a frog in her throat.

Why did Miss Piggy call in sick to work?

Because she had a frog in her throat.

What did Miss Piggy say to Kermit at the end of their first date?

Nothing. She had a frog in her throat.

Why did Kermit break up with Miss Piggy?

He wasn't ready for a Kermitment.

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Reach Jokes More Reach Jokes

How did Spider-Man reach the inner city kids?

He web-slang

Why do receipts need to be 75 feet long?

I reach into my pocket thinking I have a wad of cash, turns out I just bought a soda earlier.

Throat Jokes More Throat Jokes

Why couldn't Miss Piggy count to 100?

Because when she got to 69, there was a frog in her throat.

Why did Miss Piggy call in sick to work?

Because she had a frog in her throat.

70 Jokes More 70 Jokes

Why did the blonde move to California?

To be a star on Broadway Creds to That 70's Show S04 E6

Why can't Miss Piggy count to 70?

Because every time she reaches 69 she gets a frog in her throat.

Kermit Jokes More Kermit Jokes

What is Green, Slimy, and smells like Bacon?

Kermit's finger.

Whats green, three inches long and smells like bacon?

Kermit the frogs middle finger.

69 Jokes More 69 Jokes

Why Cant Girls Count To 70?

Because 69 is a mouthful

Why can't a blonde count to 70?

Because 69 is a bit of a mouthful.

Frog Jokes More Frog Jokes

What do you get... Q. What do you get if you cross a large dinosaur with a frog?

A. A diplo-croak-us.

Where do frogs leave their hats and coats?

In the croakroom!

Date Jokes More Date Jokes

What are you doing?

Are you writing down everything I'm saying! IS THIS GONNA BE A SONG!!" -anyone dating Taylor Swift

What's the dating scene like at MIT?

Carbon-14 is the most common method, I believe.

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

Why do accountants get excited on Saturdays?

They can wear casual clothes to work

Why does a cow need a bell?

Because its horn doesn't work.