Reddit Jokes

What did the Reddit admins do for Christmas?

Removed

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Love Card

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Why Did 9Gag Cross The Road?

To steal a Reddit User's post on the other side.

What do Reddit and building a mile long fence have in common?

Post...repost.....repost....repost...repost...

What's reddit without the R&ampD?

Edit:

What's the difference between Reddit and 9Gag?

About 5 seconds.

Where does Ben Carson spend most of his time on Reddit?

R/explainlikeimfive

What do you call a good joke on Reddit?

Unoriginal

What is purple, blue, and white and spits out dad jokes?

What do you call all of the terrible jokes on reddit arranged in a circle?

Groanhenge

Why do fencers love Reddit?

Because of all the *ripostes*

Why was the Redditors jokes so unoriginal?

Because he Reddit off the internet.

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What did the second guesser with no self esteem say to Reddit?

Edit: nevermind...

Why does repost always get to the top?

Most people reddit before

What type of animal browses Reddit?

Karma-vore

How can you tell if someone's a redditor,in real life?

Ask them if they're on reddit. I'm sorry.

What's white, blue, and red all over?

REDdit.

Why did Snoo not check out a library book?

Because he had already Reddit.

What's the difference between a 2016 Reddit post and a 2006 Reddit post?

Removed

What if reddit had a currency?

Would they be called creddits ()

What's the most overused punchline on reddit?

Removed

What do children think of the world?

I don't know, this is the first time I've logged onto Reddit, today.

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Birthday State of Mind

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How to ruin a joke on Reddit?

Misspell the paunch line.

Why don't SJWs like Reddit?

It's a real cispool.

Why is Reddit different from Facebook?

Removed

What did the man who frequents the internet do with a book?

He Reddit.

What do you call an origional joke on Reddit?

Mine

How do you get Reddit to improve their search function?

Have CNN report on how bad it is

Why won't you read this joke?

Cause you've already reddit!

What's all this talk about Reddit's servers being down?

Guess I can't see what everyone else sees.

Whats the difference between reddit and 9gag?

3 hours, but it takes 1 day for it to get to Hot

How did the tree get on to Reddit?

It just logged on...

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How many people does it take to tell a joke on reddit?

Two. One to post the joke and one to post a better punchline in the comments.

What will reddit never know?

Victoria's Secret...

What's the difference between "Fake News" and CNN?

I don't know Reddit, that's why I'm asking you

Whats common between Reddit jokes &amp Dave?

You never get tired of seeing them again &amp again...

Why shouldn't you post to Reddit while driving?

Becau

What do you call a chicken with no neck?

A Hic. ----- wife hit me with this one today. Remove the n. E. C. And k. From chicken and it spells hic. I'm sorry Reddit.

What did the Canadian Reddit user say?

Ehhhhh

What's the difference between Reddit CEO Ellen Pao, and Yoko Ono?

About 40 years.

Where does the thumb meet its type?

At the SPACE BAR! reddit is fun! I'm staring at the keyboard tryin' to think up a joke and voila'!

What's the difference between reddit and resturant?

Restaurants have better servers.

What is the best color?

What do you call a loonie answering questions on reddit?

DollarAMA. *Only Canadians will get it, sorry.

What is Reddit's favorite airliner?

Virgin airlines.

What do they call Reddit in France?

Ribbit

How to you read a book?

Just reddit.

What is the most common comment on Reddit?

OPs mother.

How do you know if a joke has been posted on reddit before?

Oh, they'll tell you.

Whats the difference between Facebook and Reddit?

About two hours.

What happens when a pizzaman does an AMA on Reddit?

OP delivers.

Where can you go on Reddit to ask questions?

Not /r/movies.

What's better than a laxative?

Reddit.

How do you tell a good joke on reddit?

Wash it up over and over again until you get gold!

Why is Reddit the best place for freedom of speech?

Removed

What do you get when you cross reddit and a weekend?

No new messages.

What's the difference between an old joke and a new one?

Nothing. We're on reddit

Who has the most karma on Reddit?

Buddha.

What did the frog with internet addiction say?

What does an r/frog say?

Reddit, reddit

Why does Reddit love Ronda Rousey so much?

She hits women

How do you find a blonde on reddit?

Look for the comments that just say "huh "

What's the difference between Reddit and the 1984 Universe?

You can leave Reddit.

What do Reddit and Duke University have in common?

They're both full of blue devs.

What's the best way to break up with your girlfriend?

On the front page of reddit.

What is the difference between Digg and Reddit?

People can Voat.

How does Reddit feel about Civil War jokes?

Because personally, I General Lee don't find them funny

What's the difference between a cheeesburger and Reddit gold?

A cheeseburger can't feed your ego.

What did the mods say when they found me giving Reddit gold to my alt account?

He who smelt it, dealt it.

What joke has recieved the most upvotes on Reddit?

Redditors.

Whoops wrong sub. Oh wait. This has been done before, hasn't it?

You probably Reddit already.

Why do Fencers avoid posting on reddit?

They are afraid of the Reposte.

What is the only thing standing between me and being rich?

I haven't hit Reddit gold yet.

How did Ellen Pao get her job as CEO or Reddit?

Deleted

What is the bibliophile's favorite website?

Reddit! Courtesy of my 32 year old boyfriend. He cracks himself up.

How many "a man walks into a bar" jokes does it take to change a lightbulb?

One, but you can be sure a whole Reddit community will appear to expand the joke, make it funnier and eventually run it into the ground.

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Newspaper Jokes More Newspaper Jokes

Why was Joe disappointed when he read the newspaper in Washington?

There were no jokes in the Post.

Why did the newspaper cross the street?

To get to the other side of the story.

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Why did the geologist's wife leave him?

He was getting physical (first joke hope you like it)

What do you call it when Batman leaves church early?

Christian Bale

Greek Jokes More Greek Jokes

What is the difference between a Greek spearman and a pale beer?

One is hoplite, and the other a light hops.

What are the first three letters of the Greek alphabet?

I.O.U.

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What would happen if all Chinese people jumped off a chair, all at the same time?

I don't know either, but you would need a reeeally big chair!

Why did the kid throw the watch out the window?

So time would fly.

Olive Oil Jokes More Olive Oil Jokes

What do you get when you mix olive oil, lemon juice, rosemary, thyme, salt, pepper and marijuana?

Cheech Marinade!

Why does Popeye have such huge forearms?

Olive Oil is a virgin

Xmas Jokes More Xmas Jokes

What lies on the bottom of the sea and shakes?

A nervous wreck! I first heard this at xmas 1952 (64 years ago) and it still makes me smile.

What has eight arms and tells the time?

A clocktopus Shoutout to the popper from my Xmas dinner

2016 Jokes More 2016 Jokes

Who remembers the 2016 presidential race?

Nobody expected that late run from Gonzalez, did they?

Which candidate will most improve our country?

2016 election: Which candidate is least likely to start The Purge

Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

What did the black kid say to his mom when he had diarrhea?

Help! I'm melting!

How did Tiger Woods get the name Tiger?

His mom is Thai and his dad is.......