Rudolph Jokes

Why did the kids not receive presents for Christmas?

Because Rudolph intentionally grounded the team...

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What did Pinocchio say to Rudolph when he asked him what he asked for Christmas?

Quit being nosey.

What was Rudolph's nickname?

Names. Because they used to laugh and call him Names. Credit to my dad.

What did the reindeer wear to protect itself while Santa was watering the garden?

Rudolph's red hose rain gear...

Why did Kim Jong-il die a week before December 25th?

Because Rudolph is the only deer leader at Christmas.

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Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Why do brown women wear red dots on their heads?

Because they record everything. (I swear I made it up n I'm brown too)

What shoes do roosters wear?

Chickenstocks

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What do you call a vegetable/fruit that dies for it's religion?

A Tomartyr

How did the homeless handicap child die?

Alone

Pinocchio Jokes More Pinocchio Jokes

Why is pinocchio so good in the bedroom?

He nose what he's doing

Why did Raggedy Anne get kicked out of the toybox?

She kept sitting on Pinocchio's face and screaming "Lie to me! Lie to me!!!"

Protect Jokes More Protect Jokes

How do you protect a valuable instrument?

Hide it in an accordion case.

What does a drunk police officer do?

Protect and swerve.

Water Jokes More Water Jokes

What's the best way to keep water from running?

Don't pay the water bill.

Why in the hell would I clean my bathtub?

I put soap and water in there every day...

Team Jokes More Team Jokes

What does a Bears fan do when his team wins the Superbowl?

He turns off his Xbox, and goes to bed.

What if a third team came and attacked these two teams?

My daughter, not understanding football/making football more awesome

December 25th Jokes More December 25th Jokes

What does a gang say on December 25th?

Merry Crips-mas

What do white girls celebrate on December 25th?

ChristMAAAAAAAAAS

Quit Jokes More Quit Jokes

Why did the alcoholic quit his acting career when the audience jeered at him?

He couldn't handle his boos.

Why did the cyclops quit his job as a teacher?

He only had one pupil.