Vodka Jokes

How do Russian sprinters train?

They put a bottle of vodka 100 meters away from them.

April Sale

I Love Pizza & You

$5.99

Why didn't JFK ever like vodka?

Because he couldn't handle a few shots

What's the Russian word for water?

Vodka

What would happen if Russia ran out of vodka?

Well, my dear reddit, in nature there is law of conservation of matter. Therefore, if the vodka disappeared somewhere, it would appear somewhere else. And then there would be Russia.

What brand of vodka does a Canadian drink?

Grey Moose

What is the difference between homeless and vodka?

Vodka does not freeze

What do you call an Arnold Palmer with vodka?

A John Daly

What did the bartender day to the man who was drinking his vodka to fast?

Stop "Russian"

What's the big deal about Jesus turning water into wine?

I turned MY student loans into vodka...

What's a Jedi's favorite brand of vodka?

Skyy. Only Sith deal in Absolut.

Why don't the jedi drink vodka?

Because only the Sith deal in absolut

April Sale

Love Card

$5.99

You might also enjoy:

Water Jokes More Water Jokes

What should be done in case of apparent drowning?

Take the parent out of the water

How do you tell if water is true or false?

Bring it to a bool.

100 Meter Jokes More 100 Meter Jokes

What do you call it when ISIS soldiers run for cover?

100 meter Daesh

What's Isis' favorite race?

The 100-meter daesh. Q: What's Isis' favorite punctuation mark? A: The em-daesh. Q: How much cinnamon does the Isis recipe for gingersnaps call for? A: Just a daesh.