Captain America Jokes

Why does Black Widow love sitting on Captain America's shield?

Because it's made out of vibranium.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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Why wasn't there a Captain America movie tie in videogame?

Because every time one bug was fixed, 2 more appeared.

What do you get when you dress The Hulk in Captain America's clothes?

A Star-Spangled Banner.

What happens to Captain America when he dies?

He goes to the Evans

What Metallica song does Captain America hate?

Trapped Under Ice.

Who fought in the Civil War?

Millennial student: Captain America and Iron Man. T: ....

What do you get when you cross Captain America and The Hulk?

A Star-Spangled Banner.

What is Captain America's shield made of?

Vibranium. What is Hawkeye's Shield made of **Quicksilver**

What do you get when you cross Captain America with The Incredible Hulk?

A star-spangled banner

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Metallica Jokes More Metallica Jokes

How did Metallica get their band name?

They Bonded over lunch.

What Metallica song does Captain America hate?

Trapped Under Ice.

Iron Man Jokes More Iron Man Jokes

What's Iron Man's favorite ride at the carnival?

The ferrous wheel.

What's the difference between Iron Man and Iron Woman?

One is a super hero and the other is a simple command.

Hulk Jokes More Hulk Jokes

What do you get when Hulk holds the American Flag?

The Star Spangled Banner!

What does Hulk say when he poops?

IBM!

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Whats the difference between a preschool and a taliban camp?

I don't know man. I just fly the drones.

What do you call a man with no hands and a book?

A read-only man.

Incredible Hulk Jokes More Incredible Hulk Jokes

What has 142 teeths and can hold back the incredible Hulk?

My zipper

What do you get when you cross Captain America with The Incredible Hulk?

A star-spangled banner

Fight Jokes More Fight Jokes

What did the Australian say to the two people fighting over bread?

It's stalemate

Who is this Rorschach guy?

And why does he paint so many pictures of my parents fighting?

2 Jokes More 2 Jokes

Why were the 2 in love melons upset?

Because they cantaloupe. (The wife thought of this one... hopefully nobody else has posted it)

Why do you need patience at the gym?

Because there is a lot of weighting. *sorry. i woke up at 2 am with this in my head.

Appear Jokes More Appear Jokes

When do ghosts usually appear?

Just before someone screams.

How did the ghost song-and-dance act make a living?

By appearing in television spooktaculars.