Crush Jokes

Why can't the hydraulic press guy bring himself to crush a can of sprite?

Because it's soda pressing

April Sale

Love Card

$5.99

What does a 16 year old girl say in West Virginia?

Get off me daddy, you're crushing my smokes

What does a girl from Arkansas say when she loses her virginity?

Get off me paw, you're crushing my smokes.

What do you call a phallic music scale, crushed under a piano?

D-flat

Why did Dr.Pepper blush?

He received a Sunkist from his Crush

Why are you crying?

Me: You just crushed all the Oreo's in my fanny pack

What's the first thing a hillbilly says after losing her virginity?

Get off me Daddy, you're crushing my cigarettes.

Why did the two boa constrictors get married?

Because they had a crush on each other!sna

How do you get over a crush you've had since high school?

Leave the dungeon door unlocked.

What do you call a soda in love?

A Crush

What does a girl from Arkansas say just before she loses her virginity?

Careful, dad, or you'll crush my smokes.

April Sale

Birthday State of Mind

$5.99

How is everything?

ME: Soul crushing and void of meaning W: I meant your meal M: Soul crushing, void of meaning, and needs salt

What's the difference between an iceberg and a clothes brush?

One crushes boats and the other brushes coats!

Why did the girl walk past her crush twice?

He didn't believe in love at first sight.

You might also enjoy:

Press Jokes More Press Jokes

Why'd the factory worker hate their job?

Because it was soda pressing.

Why didn't the weightlifter like doing chest exercises with Coke cans?

Because it was soda pressing.

W Jokes More W Jokes

How do you spell "we" with two letters without using the letters W and E?

U and I.

What's this payment?

Me: we're sponsoring a panda! W: so is this monthly M: No, it's just for the one skydive

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

What does a stock broker and a gym rat have in common?

NEED MORE GAINS

What did the doctor say to the Fonz when he got sick?

You need to take your vitamin Ayy.

Arkansa Jokes More Arkansa Jokes

How do you know that toothpaste was invented in Arkansas?

Because if it were invented anywhere else, it'd be called teethpaste.

What other US state can fit Kansas inside of it?

Arkansas

Sprite Jokes More Sprite Jokes

Why does NASA drink sprite?

Because they couldn't get 7up

What is a ghost's favorite drink?

Sprite

Step Jokes More Step Jokes

What do you call 99 bunnies walking forward and they take one step backwards?

A receding hare line.

What's the best vegetable for stepping on when you get out of the shower?

A toe-mat-o.

16 Year Old Jokes More 16 Year Old Jokes

What does a 16 year old girl say in West Virginia?

Get off me daddy, you're crushing my smokes

Why did the 16 year old Mexican girl get pregnant?

Her teacher told her to go home and do an essay.

Smoke Jokes More Smoke Jokes

Why did the duck get arrested?

Because he was smoking quack!

What do you call a tree that smokes weed?

Snoop Log