Lend Jokes

What did the poor composer say to his friend?

I am baroque, can you lend me some money?

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What is the best way to lose money?

Lend it to Greece.

What do you call it when you lend money to a bison?

A Buffa-Loan!

What did the pope give up for lent?

His job.

Why shouldn't you lend a anthropologist money?

They consider a million years ago to be Recent.

Why should you always refuse to lend an Ape money?

It's dangerous to let him put the bite on you!

Why wouldn't the frog lend his hammer to the mushroom?

Because it's a toad's tool.

Why can the Cornish always lend a hand?

They probably have a spare.

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Frog Jokes More Frog Jokes

What's green and says "hey I'm a frog"?

A talking frog! Stolen from "Friends" still hilarious.

How did the frog cross the road when a truck was coming?

SPLAT!!! He didn't.

Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

Why can't the band Def Leppard make music anymore?

They all lost their hearing

How did the dog feel when he lost his flashlight?

Delighted.

Van Gogh Jokes More Van Gogh Jokes

Why did the thieves get caught after robbing the Louvre?

Cause they didn't have the Monet to get Degas to make the van Gogh.

Why couldn't the artist get a driver's license?

He gave off a good Impression, but couldn't make a Van Gogh.

Bison Jokes More Bison Jokes

What's the difference between a buffalo and a bison?

You can't wash your face in a buffalo.

What does a buffalo says to his son before going to school?

Bison

Consider Jokes More Consider Jokes

Why is camping considered an intense sport?

Because it's intense

Why did no one ever consider Tony Stark (the Iron Man) a protagonist?

Because he was always cited as the Anthony hero.

Spare Jokes More Spare Jokes

When do spare parts from Japanese cars start falling out of the sky?

When it's raining Datsun cogs.

Why can the Cornish always lend a hand?

They probably have a spare.

Refuse Jokes More Refuse Jokes

Why did the Buddhist refuse Novocaine?

He wanted to transcend dental medication.

Why do Vampires make poor project managers?

Because the refuse you to meet with stake holders. (why yes, I am a dad why do you ask)

Ear Jokes More Ear Jokes

How much did the pirate pay to get his ears pierced?

A buck 'n ear

What is an ear of corn's favourite Leonardo DiCaprio movie?

Inception