Monastery Jokes

How many people does it take to change a lightbulb in a monastery?

Nun.

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What do you call the act of press-ganging someone into a monastery?

Force of habit.

How many pretty girls are there at a monastery?

Nun.

What did the Gregorian monk say when he was kicked out of the monastery?

Give me one more chants!

Why don't Buddhists vacuum in the corners of the monastery?

Because they have no attachments.

What do you you say when a monk tries to kick you out of the monastery?

Namaste

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Namaste Jokes More Namaste Jokes

What did the hippie say when he was kicked off the couch?

Namaste

What did the hippie say when asked to leave the party?

Namaste.

Habit Jokes More Habit Jokes

What did the tailor tell the thieving nun when he caught her red-handed?

You better not make a habit out of this.

Why do Nuns always wear Black &amp?

White? No particular reason, it's just a habit they have.

Vacuum Jokes More Vacuum Jokes

What's the difference between a vacuum and a Harley Davidson?

The position of the dirtbag

What do you call someone who cleans vacuums?

A vacuum cleaner.

Act Jokes More Act Jokes

What do you call a Mexican who acts like a white person?

A Juan-a-be

How many men does it take to make popcorn?

Four one to hold the pot and three to act macho and shake the stove.

Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many frat boys does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Four. One to change the bulb, three to stand around so he has someone to hi-five after.

How many designers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Does it really have to be a lightbulb

Buddhist Jokes More Buddhist Jokes

What do you get when you cross a Zen Buddhist with a Jehovah's Witness?

Knock knock knock... excuse me sir, but do you have a few minutes to discuss nothing

Why did the Buddhist monk refuse Novocain?

Because he wanted to transcend dental medication.

Unlock Jokes More Unlock Jokes

What do you call a monk that operates a door unlocking service?

A monkey. (p.s. I have a wonderful, terrible love for bad jokes)

What's the difference between my Grandma and the FBI?

My Grandma can unlock an iphone.

Pretty Girl Jokes More Pretty Girl Jokes

Why's a pretty girl like you sitting all alone?

Me: I peed my pants.

How many pretty girls are there at a monastery?

Nun.