Operate Jokes

What type of equipment do you operate for abortions?

A baby excavator.

This joke may have profanity.

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What Operating System does a Redditor use?

Fedora Linux!

Why do the KGB operate in groups of three?

A. "One can read, one can write and one to keep an eye on the two intellectuals."

When can you operate?

Lighting a candle* Doctor: When we find you a new liver.

What's the first thing you install on a new computer?

The operating system

When black guys say "ya feel me?

I literally feel them so they know exactly what level of white I'm operating at.

How does a redheaded surgeon operate?

Gingerly

How many FIFA officials does it take to change a light bulb?

None**. They operate in the **dark**.

What do you call a monk that operates a door unlocking service?

A monkey. (p.s. I have a wonderful, terrible love for bad jokes)

What do you call a fish that operates on brains?

A brain sturgeon.

Why do cats make better medical technicians than dogs?

Because dogs can't operate MRI machines, but catscan.

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What operating system does Varys have on his computer?

Unix

What's Varys the Spider's favorite OS?

Unix

Telegraph Jokes More Telegraph Jokes

How do telegraph operators apologize?

Remorse code

What's the three fastest ways of communication?

Telephone, telegraph, and tell-a-woman.

Computer Jokes More Computer Jokes

What do you do if you lose all the information on your computer?

Ask the NSA for a backup.

How can you tell that a black person used your computer?

It's gone.

Apologize Jokes More Apologize Jokes

What's the difference between saying sorry and apologizing?

You can say sorry at a funeral.

How did the failing Heroes of the Storm player apologize to their teammate?

I'm gonna level with you.

Matter Jokes More Matter Jokes

What do you name a deaf dog?

It doesn't matter, he ain't coming anyways.

How many Australians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they all turn them the the wrong way.

Doctor Jokes More Doctor Jokes

Why doesn't Monica Lewinsky like going to the doctor?

He always shoves a Bill down her throat!

Which country do doctors hate?

Any

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What kind of money does Mario use?

8-bitcoins

What device did Jared Fogle use to keep track of his exercise progresswhen he lost over 200 pounds on the Subway diet?

A pedometer

Remorse Code Jokes More Remorse Code Jokes

How do telegraph operators apologize?

Remorse code

What's it called when you apologize using dots and dashes?

Remorse code