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Operate Jokes

What Operating System does a Redditor use?

Fedora Linux!

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Why do the KGB operate in groups of three?

A. "One can read, one can write and one to keep an eye on the two intellectuals."

When can you operate?

Lighting a candle* Doctor: When we find you a new liver.

What's the first thing you install on a new computer?

The operating system

When black guys say "ya feel me?

I literally feel them so they know exactly what level of white I'm operating at.

How does a redheaded surgeon operate?

Gingerly

How many FIFA officials does it take to change a light bulb?

None**. They operate in the **dark**.

What do you call a monk that operates a door unlocking service?

A monkey. (p.s. I have a wonderful, terrible love for bad jokes)

What do you call a fish that operates on brains?

A brain sturgeon.

Why do cats make better medical technicians than dogs?

Because dogs can't operate MRI machines, but catscan.

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Telegraph Jokes More Telegraph Jokes

What are the three fastest forms of communication?

Telephone, telegraph, tell a woman.

How do telegraph operators apologize?

Remorse code

Microsoft Jokes More Microsoft Jokes

What does his wife call it?

Microsoft.

How is Microsoft like Bob Marley?

I do updates before I do updates. And then I do updates.

Windows 10 Jokes More Windows 10 Jokes

Why did Microsoft name their new operating system Windows 10?

Because Windows 7 8 9!

Why is the new version called Windows 10?

Because 7 ate 9.

Window Jokes More Window Jokes

Why did the man throw his watch out the window?

He wanted to see time fly!

What should you do if windows crashes cost you a lot of money?

You should Bill Gates.

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

When I'm dead, I'm going to haunt offices and say, "OooOoo... why are you using your mouse?

Hit Control-C... you're taking forever...

What do members of secret societies use when they get a head cold?

An Illumi-neti pot

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What's the darkest joke you know?

I've always been a fan or dark humor, so, what's the darkest joke you know. no boundaries, no getting offended. please don't downvote anyone because you find it offensive, that's life, get over it.

What is the 25th letter of the alphabet?

The son answers, "Y." "Because I want to know!"

Doctor Jokes More Doctor Jokes

What do you call a group of medical professionals who navigate around the Horn of Africa without being accosted by pirates?

Doctors without boarders.

Why don't they use Macs/iPads in hospitals?

Because using an Apple a day keeps the doctors away.

Electric Chair Jokes More Electric Chair Jokes

Why cant train drivers be sentenced to the electric chair?

Because they're bad conductors.

Why did the robot get the electric chair?

Because he was charged with battery.