Pimp Jokes

What does a pimp and a redneck have on common?

They both like to throw a ho-down.

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What do Welshmen call a sheep dog in Wales?

Their Pimp

What is a goat herder known as in the Middle East?

A Pimp

Which nut could pimp the Prince of Darkness?

Mack-a-Dameon.

What do you call a New Zealander with a sheep under each arm?

A pimp.

Why doesn't Gandalf dress as a pimp for Halloween?

So people do not take him as a conjurer of cheap tricks.

What do you call a pimp with his whores?

A guard and hoes.

Why did the pimp cross the lawn?

To get to the hoes.

What do you call a redneck with two sheep?

A Pimp

What do you call a pimp without a cane?

A caneless pimp.

What's the difference between a gardener and a pimp?

A gardener doesn't want his hose to have kinks.

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How is being a pimp like being a farmer?

You get some hoes and they get dough for you.

What's the highest form of praise you can receive from a pimp?

A back-handed compliment.

How are pirates like pimps?

They both have gold teeth and say "yo ho!"

How could the pimp always easily locate his ho?

Because, she really stands out on the street.

What do pirates and pimps have in common?

They both say "YO HO!" and walk with a limp!

Why'd they call the egg a pimp?

Because he got ova easy.

What do you call a Muslim who owns 6 goats?

A pimp

What do Pimps and Santa have in common?

They stay with 3 ho's

What does a pimp do when his garden needs tending?

He grabs a hoe.

What goes HO HO HO thud?

Santa laughing his head off. What goes HO HO HO A Pimp taking inventory.

What's the difference between Santa and a pimp?

Santa has just 3 Ho's...

What happened to the pimp who ate too much Italian food?

He got Pasta-toots.

Why does Gandalf never dress as a pimp for Halloween?

Because he doesn't want to be taken as a conjurer of cheap tricks.

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Wale Jokes More Wale Jokes

Why is it so hard to pronounce words in Welsh?

It is the language of Wales.

Where do you find a man with an aquatic mammal fetish?

In Wales.

Ho Jokes More Ho Jokes

What did Santa Clause say when he came down Lindsay Lohan's chimney and found her spending Christmas Eve with her pals Miley Cyrus and Paris Hilton?

Ho, ho, ho!

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa?

Santa knows to stop after three Ho's.

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What happens when you die?

Me: You go to heaven. 4: No, I mean when you die, do I get your stuff

What type of bees don't die?

Zom-bees

Sheep Jokes More Sheep Jokes

Why did the drunk guy call the sheep Legolas?

Because it was a cloud

What does a bald elephant wear for a toupee?

A sheep.

Guard Jokes More Guard Jokes

What do you call a pimp with his whores?

A guard and hoes.

What do you call a guard with a hundred legs?

A sentrypede.

Conjurer Jokes More Conjurer Jokes

Why doesn't Gandalf dress as a pimp for Halloween?

So people do not take him as a conjurer of cheap tricks.

Why does Gandalf never dress as a pimp for Halloween?

Because he doesn't want to be taken as a conjurer of cheap tricks.

New Zealander Jokes More New Zealander Jokes

What do you call a smart Australian?

A New Zealander

What do you call a New Zealander with a sheep under each arm?

A pimp.

Mexican Jokes More Mexican Jokes

Why were there 5 Mexicans in a Ford?

It was a Fiesta

What did the Mexican fire chief call his two sons?

Jose and josB (Hose A &amp Hose B)