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Pimp Jokes

What is a goat herder known as in the Middle East?

A Pimp

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Which nut could pimp the Prince of Darkness?

Mack-a-Dameon.

Why doesn't Gandalf dress as a pimp for Halloween?

So people do not take him as a conjurer of cheap tricks.

What's the highest form of praise you can receive from a pimp?

A back-handed compliment.

How are pirates like pimps?

They both have gold teeth and say "yo ho!"

How could the pimp always easily locate his ho?

Because, she really stands out on the street.

What do pirates and pimps have in common?

They both say "YO HO!" and walk with a limp!

Why'd they call the egg a pimp?

Because he got ova easy.

What do Pimps and Santa have in common?

They stay with 3 ho's

What does a pimp do when his garden needs tending?

He grabs a hoe.

What goes HO HO HO thud?

Santa laughing his head off. What goes HO HO HO A Pimp taking inventory.

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What happened to the pimp who ate too much Italian food?

He got Pasta-toots.

Why does Gandalf never dress as a pimp for Halloween?

Because he doesn't want to be taken as a conjurer of cheap tricks.

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What would be a good dating site for rednecks?

MyHeritage.com

What does NASCAR really stand for?

Non Athletic Sport Centered Around Rednecks

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why are there no podiatrist generals?

Because all they know is de feet

How many reddit admins does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Seriously who knows? It's pitch black in here.

Prince Jokes More Prince Jokes

What do you call the prince of england's donger?

The buckingham phallus.

Which nut could pimp the Prince of Darkness?

Mack-a-Dameon.

English Jokes More English Jokes

What's the different between E.T. and a refugee?

E.T. learned English and wanted to go home

What did the English man say when he walked in on his wife making love to three men?

Ello, 'ello, 'ello!

Whore Jokes More Whore Jokes

Tea Jokes More Tea Jokes

What kind of tea do wealthy people own?

Proper-Tea

What did the host say after her guest complimented her on her tea?

Thanks, it's my special tea.

Arm Jokes More Arm Jokes

What do you call a kid with no arms or legs at the front door?

Matt.

What do you call a guy with no arms and not legs laying on a porch?

Matt

Nut Jokes More Nut Jokes

What did the Psychiatrist say to the naked man wrapped in surran wrap?

Well I can clearly see your nuts

Why did my friend get a screw in her pizza?

She is allergic to nuts.